Sunday, September 17, 2017

Let's Go On With the Show. #BB19

On Friday night, the CBS episode was a special "look back" at the season,  which happens every year to provide a reminder for America's Favorite House Guest voters about all of the players.  And just about every house guest got some air time on the episode, with some getting more time than others.  And some getting more negative time than everybody else.  But that's life, and more importantly, that's business.

It's not called "Show Friends", it's "Show Business".

As the episode ended, our Final Three walked out into the backyard to compete in Part #1 of the final HoH competition, and the scene was surreal and stunning, with three unicorns galloping on clouds with a rainbow in the background.

In case you don't know, the winner of this Part #1 competition gets to sit out of the Part #2 competition to let the other two fight it out. The winner of each part will compete during the live finale on Wednesday to see who wins the Final HoH title.  And the Final HoH will evict the last member of the Jury, live on CBS.


Unlike just about every other season (BB17 and prior), no part of this HoH Part #1 competition was aired on the live feeds, but I don't think many live feeders were complaining.  It's not that kind of finale week for us, unfortunately.  I'm happy to just wait and see it play out on the Finale for a change.


And yes, the unicorns started farting, but according to Josh, it did not smell like glitter.


Unlike the elaborate set decoration, the competition was simple.  Whoever stood on their cloud and held on to their unicorn's reins the longest wins.  And I've been rolling my eyes all season at people who constantly complained about Christmas getting to the end, and how she would have to sit out of the final competitions, basically forfeiting the wins to Paul, or whoever was playing against her at the time.

You don't think Production had time to plan for this?  I know they said they wouldn't change any of the competitions to help her, but for the Finale it's different.  We may never know if details of these final competitions were altered in order to include a player wearing a boot, but I can assure you that Production wouldn't just skip a competition on the damn Finale because Christmas couldn't compete.


The clouds moved around, adding a degree of difficulty.  And noise, too.  Those clouds just don't move on their own, apparently.  There are gears to grind in the heavens---maybe they can turn those into thunder sounds when we see this play out on CBS.

SPOILER ALERT:  Paul won.  AGAIN.

And Christmas came in second, beating Josh.  I don't think Christmas made it easy for Paul, either.


We also saw the Final Three enjoy a surf and turf meal as they "reminisced" about the season's events.  The only showmance that seemed to get favored treatment was Jessica and Cody, with the tender reveal of Jessica berating Cody into his confession that he has a daughter.

Supposedly Jessica was offered a recurring role on The Bold and the Beautiful, but I haven't seen any official press release about that.  I know she has filmed twice since she left the house, but I don't think any BB player has ever booked a recurring role.  Usually the BB house guests have super cheesy appearances on that show, playing extras who make extremely lame jokes that call back their BB experiences.  Hopefully they will give Jessica more to do on the show, because she certainly has the look they like.  So good for her if this is true.   If it is true, I'm guessing we'll see it announced on the Finale, because The Bold and the Beautiful is a business, too.


One fun thing we got to see on the Friday episode is the fight between Kevin and Matt that wasn't shown on the live feeds at all.  In fact, after we saw Matt yell shrilly if Kevin is "going to come at me, bro", the feeds went down for about two hours.  I think we were expecting expulsions or injuries when the feeds returned, so seeing what happened was satisfying.  It's nice to be surprised about BB, because I usually know in advance what will happen, and I don't like surprises.  But this was a good one.

As Matt got silly with Kevin, Raven jumped right in on it, which is her pattern, and she really made an ass out of herself, which is also her pattern.


And Matt got to do his high-pitched "bro" fighting voice, too, complete with his hands in the air and moving around the backyard in LEGO fashion, moving away and then back towards Kevin.  Elsewhere in this episode, we saw Kevin in the DR saying "I don't like Matt, and I don't want to talk about him.  If I have to, I'll leave".

So I think I know whose side Production is on....the same side we're on.  Does Matt have a fan base?  I've never seen proof of that anywhere, which is kind of sad.  I guess Raven's family is pulling for him, even if they've retreated into a Cloud of Silence and Shame after CBS started showing Raven as she really is on the CBS episodes.


During this little skirmish, Kevin told Matt that everyone is lying to him this week while he's on the block, even Jason.  Then Alex had to jump up and start in on Kevin, making the attack personal (OF COURSE) by calling him old.  And Raven had to jump in on that, too. Maybe Raven will get an offer to be a recurring character on The Jerry Springer Show.

Kevin let off some steam at Alex for the first time this season, and I think what he said must have stung a bit.

Kevin:  You'll get second place!  Who is going to vote for you?  A SHOE COULD BEAT YOU......A SHOE COULD BEAT YOU IN THIS GAME.

Oh, and Raven also yelled at Kevin that he was shady.

Kevin:  Oh, and YOU'RE NOT?

Yes, Kevin yes.  I understand why Kevin tried to stay out of the fights this season, but damn he could have made some people cry, I'll bet. And I would have LOVED it.


Even at his worst, Kevin was a classy house guest.  He was so fun to watch on the live feeds, and his stories and comments about music were delightful.  Last night on BBAD there was a scrolling comment from "Orwell" saying that they would give anything to watch Kevin read the Bible, or make a bowl of ice cream again on the live feeds.

You and me both, Orwell.  Kevin was a breath of fresh air.  And even his house clothes showed flair, with the rolled up leg and head scarf.  There will never be another Kevin Schlehuber.


 ******

All they seemed to do all weekend is sleep, after competing so much and also drinking two bottles of good champagne.  And because Paul won the Part #1 competition, he surely felt relaxed, and knew he could clock out for awhile, at least until he knew who won the Part #2 part of the competition.

All three of them sleep in the Rose Room, with Josh in the round bed, and Christmas and Paul in this bed.  At the beginning of BBAD, Julie makes a little announcement that says "Stay up....be bad..." and then for most of two episodes we just watched them sleep for three hours, with various close up camera shots of items on the floor, and lighting fixtures in the air.


We saw close ups of each apple installation in the house, from the two trees, to the black glass apples on a table, and the green apples in the lounge, of course.  Sometimes the house guests would wake up and bring snacks back to bed.  One night Josh abruptly woke up just after 11:00 and thought they had slept through the entire night and it was the next day.  Apparently the clock in the kitchen says "AM" at night, and Josh had never noticed that.

During BB17, I think it was Johnny Mac who set the stove to give digital information in Spanish, so maybe the settings have been off since then.


They played the Part #2 competition yesterday, and it went on for HOURS.  There were three different platforms to work through, and they had to collect "ammo" and knock over cardboard cutouts of former house guests.  Jillian really messed Josh up, and Elena and Raven gave Christmas a hard time.  Christmas also went off on a tirade about Cameron, calling him a "bitch ass" and saying he should "get the fuck out of here".  Which he already did, of course, about 14 weeks ago.

SPOILER ALERT:  Josh won Part #2 of the Final HoH competition, and will face off against Paul for the Final HoH role during the live finale.

But Josh only beat Christmas by about 5 minutes.  And it sounds like some of the areas that Paul told Josh to study really helped him out.  For example, Paul told Josh to start thinking about how many times each person sat on the block.  Paul also said Mark's cardboard cutout had a smug look on his face, and that would have bothered him.

So....Paul is focusing on Josh now, making sure Josh knows that Paul plans to take him to the Final Two, but in a stealthy, whispery way.  I'm pretty sure Paul will make sure he keeps tabs on Josh and Christmas until then, except when he's in the Diary Room.  Paul is already on repeat with Josh, saying "We did it", and "One of us won $50,000, and the other $500,000".  And Paul told Josh that Christmas would get a 100% vote at the end, but the same people hate both of them, so the vote can go either way.

Paul cooked buffalo chicken and Christmas made a salad.  And they all ate on plastic trays, which we've already established that I would REFUSE to do.  I would have STORMED out on Day #2 if I wasn't given a proper ceramic plate.  Those plastic trays have an etched pattern on them....there is NO WAY that you can properly clean those in that house.  For example, I watched Josh open up the Costco multi-packs of raw chicken breasts and cut up a few of them for the night's dinner on one of those very red trays.  And then he left the rest of the chicken, along with the drippy, slimy plastic wrappings right there on the table for at least 30 minutes.


Josh told us he's taking both owls home with him to Miami.  The one on the left is Theodore, and the other is Orwell.  Most people can't tell them apart, but Josh says Theodore has one wandering eye.

Josh: Orwell just looks right at you and doesn't give a fuck.  I love both of them, but I'm leaning towards Orwell being my favorite.



****ABOUT THE FINALE****

I know everyone is talking about this, but I'm not sure it's something we should get too excited about.  The Jury Round table took place on Friday night, and this is what appeared on Hamsterwatch the following day.


I know Hamsterwatch isn't going to present information that isn't from a credible source, and apparently the source for this information is the same source that reported that Paul would be a on the BB19 cast, so I do believe that the Jury round table is going to be somewhat explosive.

(Because we already saw a preview of some  Jury rowdy behavior last week.)

Do you think Kevin will change his mind about voting for Paul?  If so, I think Paul's shitty good-bye message might be the deciding factor, because by now Kevin knows all about Paul's season-long deceptions, and maybe even how much shit Paul talked about him in a very cruel manner.

Do you think Alex would change her vote?  That's what I'm not sure about.  We all know how stubborn Alex is, and also how much influence she has on Jason in general.

And would Cody vote for a Beta to win Big Brother?  I doubt that.  And surely either Christmas or Josh would vote for Paul to win, because they won't have time to hear details of all of Paul's dirty dealings before they cast their vote.

The cynic in me thinks this rumor is getting floated so people will still be interested in watching the Finale.  Just a guess.  I can live with either Paul or Josh winning, because this season is already going to be "one of those" seasons that we try to forget as quickly as possible. But Christmas winning BB19?  I can't handle that, and I'm sure that is a TERRIBLE option for CBS as well.  But only because of her broken foot, because otherwise a winner like Christmas would be a huge feather in the BB cap, I think.

And it's a TWO-HOUR finale this year, for the first time ever.  The 90 minute finales always cut off much too quickly, with the drama of the reveal of America's Favorite House Guest always just about to get cut off the end of the DVR recording.  We're always left hanging with the aftermath of that, like when Frankie Grande's plastic face fell when he wasn't even in the Top Three.

So hopefully we'll get at least one segment after that to reflect on the announcement.  I'm pretty sure we'll get a family segment, too, due to all of the various controversies this season.  Just off the top of my head, here are a few topics that might qualify:

*  Christmas' broken foot
*  Jason's pregnant wife
*  Jason's controversial jokes
*  Kevin's wife's view of Jason's controversial jokes (she already commented on TMZ..whew boy..)
*  Kevin's family's view of Alex's hateful comments
*  Josh's family's experience with Hurricane Irma
*   Cody's daughter's view of Jessica and/or his experience on the show
*   Raven's mother's comments about Raven's many fibs and tall tales
*   Raven's mother's views of her relationship with Matt

I think they could feature at least three or four of those topics, if they give the families a heads up about it.  Or maybe Raven's mother might be more interesting if caught off-guard.  I guess it depends on if we're going Full Springer with this or not...

*****

And today's title comes from the famous song, of course.