Thursday, August 3, 2017

Everyone's Under the Weather. #BB19

The PoV competition that was broadcast on the CBS episode last night confounds me.  This was a new competition last year, and the general consensus was that everyone loves it.  However we didn't get to see much of it on TV, and none of it on the live feeds.

This is common for most PoV competitions, but for this one, we never got a good explanation for the scoring system, or how the final scores were calculated.

We were told that each time the players correctly completed the missing word in the sentence they were required to read during their "live" broadcast that they earned one point, but I heard the house guests talking about other methods to score points.  For example, I think they scored a point for hanging on to the umbrella the entire time.

Did they get style points?  If so, Jason should have earned a few with his energetic portrayal of "Jason Thunder".

The station needs to review "Cody Cloud's" contract though.  Sure he showed up on time and tried to give the information accurately, but he clearly wasn't very concerned about the storm.

It was just another rainy day for Cody Cloud, apparently.

"Raven Rain" is trying to climb the TV ladder like most of the small-town weather girls.  If she works real hard this year she might get to move up to the Little Rock overnight shift.

But "Kevin Lightning" needs to meet with a career counselor to figure out some other employment options.  Perhaps he should just do weather live from the station, in front of a green screen.

Because reporting live on the scene didn't seem to be his forte.

The Weather Channel is based here in Atlanta. I met a girl at the gym a few years ago who was a producer there.  I used to travel every week for my job at the time, and she told me that whenever she traveled for her job, it wasn't any sort of plush situation.  Her team was headed to the shore when a hurricane was on the way, or to the decimated ruins of a town just leveled by a tornado.  Half of the time they couldn't even get a pizza delivered, due to the circumstances.  I think there is a movie or a TV series in there somewhere, right?  Kevin Lightning would be the station boss, I think, or maybe the sports guy....basically anything but the weather guy.

"Jessica Puddle" is going to get a lot of phone calls at the station front desk after each broadcast, I predict, probably broken down as follows:

Men who want to get her number                        23%
Men who just breathe heavily into the phone        9%
Women who complain about her clothing            31%
Women who complain about her makeup             26%
Hangups traced to Cody Cloud's cellphone          11%

I am from a small town and was friends with our local weather girl.  Trust me when I say that there are people who call the station to complain about a hairstyle or clothing color choice that they don't like.  But the callers who place the call  to compliment her are almost worse than the complaint calls.  Because, creepy.  Whenever I went somewhere with her, we always got to cut the line, and got free appetizers and/or rounds of drinks. Everybody wants to schmooze with a local TV star.

And of course "Paul Bluster" won the PoV.   He played this same competition last year, too, and won that one  as well.

I know they don't want to show us the raw footage of the competition, without the sound effects and all, so I guess we'll just have to take their word for it as far as the results go.  It does seem odd that without taking part in the all night study sessions, Jessica and Cody were only about 5 points behind Paul.

I guess that's why it's not Show Friends, it's Show Business.


Late Wednesday afternoon, the house guests were sent to the backyard to practice for what is sure to be an upcoming competition, based on mini--golf.  They do something like this every year, and typically it is the preliminary set up for the live HoH competition.

(During BB11, Chima through a legendary shit-fit as they were practicing for this competition, and threw her microphone into the hot tub.  She was later booted from the game after she finally went to the Diary Room after being called by Production numerous times.  Allison Grodner famously told Chima "no need to sit down" as she entered the Diary Room and was whisked away into an adjoining hallway, never to be seen again on any CBS shows.)

Paul read the instructions aloud, and they each got to make 10 practice shots and were encouraged to move around the "hazards" in order to try a variety of different methods.  Usually they just let them practice as much as they like during a given time frame, but I guess with the house so divided they wanted to make sure the practice time was as fair as possible.  The instructions clearly indicated that "everyone" should take the practice shots, including Paul, the outgoing HoH.  Paul is speculating that this means he can win HoH consecutively, due to Jessica's Hex.

Raven was SURPRISINGLY good, and clearly had a natural knack for the game.  She didn't spend much time setting up her shots, and seemed to use instinct as she made shot after shot well.

This is the janky crate they were using as the target.  Raven even switched from hitting right-handed to left-handed during her practice session and did equally well both times.

Kevin:  Are you sure you're not the manager of a mini golf, rather than a dancer?

Raven did a lot of little dancey moves as she made her 10 shots.  I think everyone in the backyard had a moment of fear as they watched Raven practice, except maybe Matt, of course.

On the live show, these types of competitions are always conducted quickly.  Each person is expected to step up and take their turn without delay.  They usually draw for spots to determine the order, because it is usually helpful to go later since you can watch how everyone else performs, and of course to know the highest score you have to beat.

In BB16, Derrick's turn was right after Zach's, and he later told Zach he won by shooting the ball in the exact direction Zach did, but with a little more power.  Derrick won that HoH, and gave Zach credit since Zach plays lots of golf in Florida.

But going last could hurt you though, if your nerves can't take it.  Who can handle the pressure on live TV tonight? The excitement of that is what keeps me interested in this show, actually.  We see these people hang around the house all day long, but learning who can perform under stress, whether it is hitting a mini-golf shot or just answering a question from Julie Chen is fascinating to me.

Oh, and good posture is very important, Elena, if you ever read this. Your slump isn't doing you any favors here.

Elena hit a few good shots when it was her turn, too, but she took about 10 minutes to do it.  She studied the angles and moved around to plan each attempt.  That's smart and all, but she is only going to have about 30 seconds on the live show.  Julie won't be shy about telling them to hurry, either.

Who do you think will get bleeped due to cursing after their shot?  Maybe a better question is who WON'T get bleeped out on live TV.

Later I heard someone say that Elena made it look like she really wants to win this HoH, but that was likely an act since she really doesn't think she needs to win right now.

Here is a shot of the entire set-up.  For the actual competition it will be all gussied up with a theme, perhaps some moving elements, and probably a variety of targets with differing point values.

Jason did pretty well in his practice session, and appeared loose and confident in the process.  For each person's practice session, Kevin provided a running commentary that was a good audition for a sportscaster, actually.  His analysis was insightful and witty.

I tried to take a picture of Christmas hawkeying everybody as they made their shots, but Jason stepped right in front of the camera.  So we'll just go with this shot.

I just remembered that yesterday Jason took a shower with Christmas and Alex sitting on the bathroom couch talking to him. Jessica was there, too, waiting for Cody to take a shower after Jason. After Jason was finished and Jessica and Cody were alone in the bathroom, she made the comment that Jason's wife must be livid to have a wench like Alex follow him around like that while he's taking a shower.

Does ANYBODY think there is any sort of romantic vibe between Alex and Jason?  The answer is clearly NO.  Alex is not in the game for that, and Jason himself has said that Alex "is a dude".  I know Jessica does not like Alex, so I think she is just trying to find things to complain about with this.

And there is Christmas Abbot, with her game face on.  Later Christmas had the wrong idea about what the competition will be like.  She thought that they would each get about five shots during the competition, and also the option to move the obstacles around at will before each shot.  She was positive that moving the obstacles would result in a point deduction.  Her face literally fell when Matt gave her the bad news about only getting one shot on a course that would look dramatically different then the one they just practiced on.

I wasn't sure Matt was even going to tell her the bad news, because he ate most of a sandwich while Christmas told several house guests how the competition would play out.  I wonder if Christmas noticed that.....he waited a good long time before speaking his piece, including the fact that they played this same competition in BB16.

These two watched intently from the sidelines, and there was much discussion later about how concerned and unhappy they both were about the nature of this competition.  Cody was one of the first to take his practice shots, and he did sink one ball, but later his detractors pointed out that he only tried to make straight shots, without trying to hit around any of the obstacles.

Cody does have a history of watching BB on TV, at least, so I'm sure he has an idea about what the actual competition will entail.  He doesn't feel the need to talk about it, of course.  Paul later rounded up his troops with the instruction to heckle both Cody and Jessica when it is their turn to shoot.

Will that be allowed on the live show?  I'm trying to remember if we've ever seen that happen during a live competition, because over the years we've had plenty of bad blood and hateful feelings among the cast, right?  I know it's easy to talk big now, but when the lights are turned up and Julie Chen is on the mic, reality is a much different story.

Christmas did an okay job with her practice shots.  It seems strange to me that she didn't practice without the scooter. Later I heard someone comment about something Christmas said that didn't make sense, and Kevin weighed in on the situation.

Kevin:  Meds fucked Christmas up.  She should just go home and come back next year.

Alex did a pretty good job, too, sinking several shots into the janky target basket.  I'm sure the thought of Alex winning HoH this week puts some real fear into the hearts of a few of the house guests.

From what I've heard Alex say, she really wants Mark and Elena out of the game, but of course Jessica and Cody aren't getting any holiday cards from her, either.

(I used "Christmas cards" the first time I wrote this, but it's too confusing with Christmas the Person sitting right there.  In the early weeks of the game I kept typing "Summer" instead of Christmas, for some reason but I tried to clean up my mistakes before posting.)

After the practice session, Raven and Christmas couldn't wait to discuss how they saw Jessica shaking as she held the ball before each shot.  They also said that Jessica always likes to go first for everything, but for this competition she tried to go last.

I didn't notice any shaking while I watched Jessica, but I don't see her winning any PGA tournaments anytime soon, either.  When Mark took his turn, he did HORRIBLE and later his critics said he was hitting the ball way too hard.  I don't remember Matt's turn, so that in itself is kind of telling.  I was on the treadmill while I watched it...I remember wondering if he would wear that horrid orange blouse on the live show.

Kevin went last and was the life of the party, as usual.  He claimed to have never golfed before, but who knows if that is true.

Paul and Jason kept calling out Kevin's last name (pronounced "Shlay-uber") the entire time Kevin practiced.

Kevin:  Don't say my last name....just say Kevin, because I owe a few people money and they might be watching this.

This brought up some funny jokes from the crowd about how when Kevin leaves the house, three guys will be waiting outside the door to grab him before he gets to Julie.  And then another potential scenario where Kevin is sitting with Julie for his interview, and spots the guys in the crowd and makes his getaway.  On last night's CBS show Kevin joked in one of his DRs about owing some money, too.

Please note that Kevin rolls up the left leg of his pants.  This is a common look for Kevin, but I don't know the reason for it.  He does like to wear natty socks, so perhaps this is a way to showcase his colorful collection.

And Kevin did something that seemed very smart to me....he went over and asked Jessica's opinion about lining up a particular shot, making both Jessica and Cody giggle.  Just for a moment, they probably felt welcome out there, and part of the group.

And if the two of them had to pick someone to evict immediately, the last person they would name right now is Kevin, I think.  Kevin knows a little kindness can go a long way.

Kevin put some Body English on this shot after trying something new.  He did have a few successful shots, but I'm not sure Kevin will want to win this week.  He doesn't need to win right now, and he is smart enough to know that.


On BBAD last night, everyone knew it was the calm before the storm, but some people are more worried than others.  Kevin wore this scarf, giving us a Keith Richards type of vibe.  He and Jason had the HoH room to themselves for a few minutes, watching the Spy Screen and talking smack about their situation.

If they win HoH, Jason thinks they should nominate Matt and Elena, like they wanted to do weeks ago.

Kevin: Yeah, Mark isn't going to win anything.  He's terrible.  And everybody wants to get rid of Jessica?  No think you....Cody is going to win everything around here.

Kevin, watching the Spy Screen:  Look at these love birds.  What the fuck is going on down there?

Jason:  Oh, she's just laying between his legs.

The BBAD crew dutifully show us what our friends Jason and Kevin are talking about.

Kevin: They only met a few weeks ago.....

Jason:  And he was gone for a week....

Kevin: And they want to do this on TV?

Alex came upstairs to  join them and they pretended to be sleeping when she first walked in.  But you can't fool Alex.

Alex:  I can't stand anybody in here.  I hate Elena.

Alex went into detail about the boring stories that Elena tells.  Kevin agrees, saying that Elena rolls her eyes when she speaks as Alex imitates her.

Jason:  Can you just tell a long story short?

Alex:  Exactly.  This is exactly how she talks.

Jason pretended to shoot himself, having to listen to all of this mindless chatter in the house.  Yesterday Kevin was saying, "can we please just send somebody home please?  and maybe have a quadruple eviction?"

Kevin asked Alex if she heard what Elena and Jessica said to Jason the first week of the game.

Jason:  It was the first week, and they called me over to the hammock and asked me if I would rather go home first, or be the first on the Jury.

Alex told Kevin something he didn't know....that Mark thinks Kevin can't be trusted.

Kevin:  WHAT?  When did he say that?

Alex:  I don't know....we've been here so long.  Last week, maybe?  He said you were shifty and he knows for a fact that you're the one who made the vote against Jillian.

Kevin:  Well let's get that motherfucker out next, then. Why would he say that about me?

Jason thinks Elena is a bigger threat then Mark is, but Alex pointed out that Mark can win when he needs to win, which makes him a threat.

Kevin promised them that if Elena is on the block, that is who he is voting out, and they don't need to ask him twice about it.

Kevin:  If she comes up to me and asks if I love her, and if I'm keeping her, I'm saying yes to her, but when I go see Julie, she's the one I'm voting out. Once I give you my word, I'm doing it.

Alex:  So don't tell her that then, tell her...

Kevin:  No, once I give YOU my word, YOU TWO then I'm gonna do it.  You don't even have to ask me.  I'm not for world peace. I'll just be down there in my bed.


Kevin:  I had to tell Paul 29 times yesterday that I'd vote Jessica out if I can this week.  I like her, but I'll vote her out.  I'm not gonna be mean though.  And Ramses knows now that I voted him out....he watched the TV show and said that motherfucker.....

Jason is cracking up as Kevin goes on his tirade.  It's funny.

Kevin also said he doesn't mind using the shower downstairs, because he's just in and out of there.

Kevin:  In the military the men take five minutes to clean themselves and get out.  Why do you need to be in there so long?  What are you doing, playing with yourself?

Alex doesn't want to talk to Mark anymore, because "he's a big crybaby".  Kevin left the room and they watched him go downstairs.  They know he is going to get to the bottom of what Alex said about Mark targeting him.

Jason:  Did Mark really say that?

Alex: No. I just wanted Kevin to go after Mark.

Kevin found Paul in the storage room and demanded to know if he is the one who told Mark about the votes.

Kevin:  YOU asked me to vote that way, so I did it!

Paul swore to Kevin that he didn't tell Mark, and I don't think he did.  Paul talked his way out of it, of course, but I don't know if Kevin really believes that or not.  I think Kevin is on to Paul, but Paul is useful to him now.  I don't think there is any chance Kevin wants to go to the end with Paul, if he has any choice in the matter. That's just a hunch, though.

Paul:  Mark said he thought you did it, but I said Kevin didn't do that, because he would never cross me...

Kevin:  Never.

Paul went up to the HoH where for the 1,000th time they discussed what Jessica said about her Hex to everyone, and what they think it actually means.  And then they discussed it again, and again, going over each possibility.  They're not even sure that the Hex exists, because they've seen both Jessica and Cody pack their belongings, as the nominees are expected to do each week.

Paul also went over the Mark situation, because neither Alex or Jason know about Kevin's vote to evict Ramses.  Paul blamed it on Dominique, of course, because she's not around to defend herself.

Kevin:  If we win HoH, and they give me some wine, Mark better not come in that door.

Paul thinks Matt and Raven would never take a shot at them, because they think they will get taken to the end.  They saw Raven come up the stairs and immediately changed their topic of conversation, and Jason pretended to take a shower.

The viewer tweet below summed it right up.  Paul immediately started talking about how Jessica lied on the live show about the power of her Temptation.

And then Josh came in and Paul said he planned to "pots and pans those motherfuckers all night" before asking Josh to help him with that.  Raven plans to wear her lucky shirt on Thursday night, to ensure her HoH win. Paul immediately started talking about their group going to Final Eight, and how they will have the halfway party soon.

(After Raven's practice shots, I think everybody realized the HoH room might be Arkansassy next week.)

Mark and Elena are both telling everyone except Jessica and Cody that they plan to nominate Jessica and Cody if they win HoH.  But I'm not sure that is true.....I've seen both of them pledge loyalty to Cody and Jessica in the last few days.

It really all depends on who wins HoH, as usual.  We're due for a real shocker in that area, to be honest.

Matt actually has some solid game observations.  For example, everyone was speculating about a double eviction tonight, but he pointed out that they wouldn't have time for the Temptation Competition, and Julie said they would have that for the next two evictions.

How can the results of this BBAD poll not be off the damn charts?

Elena and Mark went in the Have Not room where he helped her arrange pillows and blankets for a comfortable night's sleep.  How many pillows do they have in that house?  And does anyone else in the Have Not room get to use any for their own bed?

Josh did a dance routine all by himself in the dining area, knowing that he was being watched on the Spy Cam.

Elena joined him for some swing dancing, and BBAD asked the viewers if they have confidence in the duo of Jason and Mark.

Spoiler Alert:  They don't.  Have confidence, that is.

The HoH crew changed the channel to the hallway, and saw Mark standing at the railing, watching Josh dance with Elena.

And then Mark went down there and got in on the dancing, too, as the BBAD poll quizzed the fans about which version of Big Mark they like the best.

Spoiler Alert:  Mark is not a good dancer.  He knows there is a beat there somewhere....he just can't find it.

Most of the viewers would rather spend a night out with Kevin, but some of the Paul fans aren't so sure.  


It's rare that we see TMZ publish a positive story about a BB house guest, but maybe they were hoping to dig up some really juicy dirt.  Instead, Cody's story checks out.  I thought TMZ would mention Cody's frequent comments about wanting to join the military so he could kill certain people, but there was no mention of that.

That's just part of the job, I guess.