Friday, July 29, 2016

Slow Your Roll, Son. #BB18

I took a mental health break after last night's live show but I'm back now, trying to get up to speed with the current situation in the house.

I'm sure you know by now that Your Boy Paul won HoH by rolling a score of 21. He's not my boy, of course, but he won the HoH anyway.  That was a strange situation last night, watching the house guests practice on live TV.  There is a lot of chatter online about that, but I think it was exciting to watch them scramble and figure out a strategy.

What I didn't like, however, is that the live feeders didn't get to watch it play out on the live feeds.  Scorned and screwed again.

We did see that Paulie threw the competition in a very obvious fashion.  He was the first house guest to use his red ball and he used it pretty quickly after the live show ended.  Paulie expects next week to be the first Double Eviction, and he wants to be able to play for HoH, so that's why he threw the competition.  Paulie rolled a score of 6.

But it won't be a double eviction, though, because Julie always tells us about that in advance, to pump us all up for the next live show.

Corey must have had a really bad roll, because he is one of the unfortunate Have Nots this week.  I thought this might be a great competition for him, since he was a pitcher on his college baseball team.  The other Have Nots are Zakiyah, Paulie, and Natalie.

Zakiyah:  I'm a Have Not, but I don't give a shit!  I'll lose some belly fat this week, but it's worth it to have Paul as the HoH!

Supposedly the Have Not extra foods are bacon, hotdogs and capers.  So....not really such a hardship for the meat-eaters.  After Corey passed out the last time he was a Have Not, maybe they decided to let them eat some more protein.  Hopefully they will let Corey sleep on the floor of the Have Not room.....even if you hate him you have to agree that it's not fair to ask someone his size to squeeze into those bumper cars for seven nights.

And here's Paul wearing the key to the HoH room, along with a smirky grin.

Da'Vonne is happy, too, but maybe she shouldn't be, because Paulie has been doing a lot of talking about how she is the backdoor target this week.  Of course, many people think that Day may have the Round Trip ticket in her Secret Room envelope, since she picked envelope #8.

Da'Vonne:  Best!  Best!  Couldn't be happier!

In case you're wondering, this is the reason why people think envelope #8 is the winner.  This is a picture taken at least a month ago, coincidentally of Day as she strolls down the hallway next to the sign.  It says "Ocho Rios Your Dream Destination".  And "ocho" means "eight" in Spanish.  It makes sense, particularly due to the "dream destination".

If Day indeed has the winning envelope, I'm sure Production would be THRILLED for her to be evicted this week, so the whole Secret Room twist would have a major payoff.  Can you imagine Day coming back in the house, flipping her braids at everyone who voted her out?  Fantastic.

I haven't had time to watch all of the post live show action last night, nor even one minute of BBAD, but I do know that Paulie wants Da'Vonne out, so he has convinced Paul that she is a better target than Bridgette.  Paul plans to nominate Bridgette next to a pawn who will come down off the block after the PoV, leading the way for Da'Vonne to take a seat on the block.

Note that one of the things that Paul finds "sketch" about Da'Vonne is that she "still tried hard to win" the HoH even after seeing that Paul rolled such a high score.

(Never mind that Da'Vonne has a kid that she would like to see pictures of.....)


I don't remember exactly what Julie told the house guests about this twist, but they certainly seem to know that the prizes will get better as the weeks go by, and that each house guests can only win once.

Earlier this afternoon, the house guests gathered in the backyard and we had FISH while the event took place.  I'm guessing one of the Beefcakes (a BB17 term) threw the box off the roof, attached to a little parachute.

Natalie won, which is certainly not a surprise, since whoever the group is that votes in the daily JokerUpdates house guest poll has voted her at or near the top for weeks now.  But did they really think about how winning this Care Package would affect her game?  And did they realize that the prizes in the upcoming weeks would have been MUCH more beneficial for Natalie since they would give her power?  And that she wasn't a target this week at all?

I think they just ran to the polls to vote as soon as they heard about it, without strategizing at all. Paulie's family got it, and tweeted out to his fans not to vote for him.  But let's face it, Paulie is at the rock bottom of the Jokers poll, so this tweet likely had little to do with Natalie's win.

Natalie was thrilled to win the Care Package, and kept saying that she is shocked, and thought she had no chance to win.  We didn't get to see the box come down out of the sky, or how the house guests even knew that she won---we just got to see this scene of her rejoicing and everyone else standing around, probably shell-shocked.

"Patty" was prancing around in his HoH robe.

I can't.  I just can't, and you all know that.

We got a rare taboo glimpse of where the handheld camera men work, in the dark, creeping with their cameras to shoot through windows.  And the camera guys do a lot of creeping on Natalie, particularly when she's outside enjoying the sun.

But that's their job, of course.

(Did you know that A LOT of people who have foot fetishes watch Big Brother and frequent sites like this one due to all of the bare feet?  I never knew that, but during BB12 I got some requests for pictures of Brendon and Hayden's feet.)

Sorry, back to wholesome Natalie.  She got the "Never Not" pass, and also a few other items that seem strange, but might have been included by one of her friends.  There were cookies, dental floss, and this sheet of stickers from Claire's.  There were also some Friendship Bracelets.

As you might guess, as soon as the crowd came back in the house and dispersed, the shit talking started.  Basically everyone is salty because they don't feel that Natalie does anything in the house to play the game, and has little potential to win competitions.

Nicole:  She probably got it because of James....maybe her DR's are surprisingly good....

Michelle:  She's the last person I suspected of winning it....

Corey: And the one person in here who doesn't mind being a Have Not. C'mon America, figure it out.

Nicole:  Her true colors have started to come out though.  Yesterday she was talking about prostitutes, and she put that condom on the zucchini...and she used the Eff word.

(Keep digging that hole Nicole.....don't "Eff word" with the JokersUpdates fans when you know America has power in the game....)

Nicole thinks some of their families didn't want them to win this week---they wanted to wait until the really good prizes come into play.

Paulie came in and the shit-talking kicked into a higher gear.  He shared with the group that he and Paul are now calling Natalie "F.T.", and after they couldn't guess what that stood for, Paulie told them.

Paulie:  Fake titties!  It stands for fake titties!

Paulie also let them know that he doesn't want Natalie to float along until the end like Victoria or Gina Marie.

Michelle:  Gina Marie won some comps though.

Paulie:  Yeah, maybe.  But I don't want someone thinking they can take her all the way to the end because it's an easy win.

Nicole:  What if she's being really super-secretive and she's really super-smart?

Corey:  No, I knew within 5 minutes of meeting her that was not the case.

Michelle:  I knew when I was looking at the ingredients on the package of Cool Whip, and said it was full of vegetable oil, and Natalie asked if that meant there were vegetables in there.

Nicole wanted to know exactly what Natalie said to Corey in the first five minutes to make him think she was stupid.  Corey said it was really 30 seconds, when they all saw their pictures pop up on the Memory Wall and Natalie pointed to his picture and said "he's hot".

Natalie came in and chatted with them, oblivious to what they were just talking about.  She sweetly offered to share anything in her Care Package box with anyone who wanted it.

Later, Paulie would say that people thought she celebrated too much after winning, and rubbed people the wrong way about it.

James visited Natalie in the Nairobi Lounge, and told her to watch out, because sometimes winning prizes like this could have a bad impact in the game.

Natalie:  But I didn't ask for it!  They gave it to me.

James:  I know, but still, people can take it the wrong way...believe me, I know.

James addressed the cameras, thanking America for giving Natalie the Care Package.

Do you think James might be a little bothered by the fact that Natalie won?  He'll probably win the next one, due to the voting base, but at least he's on the right side of this week's winner, unlike everyone else in the house.  Except Bridgette maybe.

This is the arm from the ceramic cat that we saw fall off on the premiere episode when someone (Bridgette?) lightly touched it.  I think they use it as a microphone.  Pretend, of course.

Meanwhile upstairs in the HoH room, Paulie and Paul are trying to have a conversation, but are irritated that Victor ("the executive") won't leave them alone.  The Paris room has been closed, but the house guests have learned that the telephone code still works, and they can still hear the recorded message.  The little latch in the secret panel is broken, so they can still crawl in the tunnel, but they can't get in the Paris room anymore.  They wondered if someone could crawl inside that tunnel to eavesdrop on their conversation, so they sent Victor on a mission to try it.

After he left, they talked about him, of course.  He migrates to the power, they say, and will target Nicole if he wins HoH, so they want to keep him around for awhile.

Victor spoke out loud in the tunnel, and it was just like he was in the room with them, so now they know whoever is in the tunnel can overhear them.

Paulie:  He just completed his first mission for us.

(I told ya'll that I thought the window in the tunnel overlooked the HoH room....and it did.  I'm just surprised that they could hear Victor so clearly from where they were sitting.  Those camera people are really stealthy, which must make their jobs much harder than the average TV crews.)

Victor came back into the room with them, and said that he was so primed to win the HoH tonight.

Victor:  I'm was ready to put up Nicole and Natalie, with zero fucks given.

The guys chuckle and say they hope Victor wins HoH next week.  Victor says that Nicole never talks game with him, and usually stops talking when he comes in the room.  It wasn't like that before he left the game, he says.

Paul:  She's probably scared of you.

Victor:  And if I win HoH, I'm just going to say to Natalie very briefly, that I saw her good-bye message.  And I saw one from Bronte, and from you and you.  (Paul and Paulie, I think.)

Natalie said something in her good-bye message about Victor not respecting women, and Victor is still very upset about that, knowing that it must have upset his mother to see that.

Paulie:  She lied about it, she said she wished you well in her goodbye message and didn't say anything bad.

Victor:  The only bad thing Bronte said is that I had a bad social game, and I can live with that.  I'm not mad at that.  And the guy who put me out of the house (Paulie) even left me a good message, but her?  I'm still pissed about it.

He says that Natalie is the one who is always talking about how fat she's getting, and she was always asking him for nutritional advice and workout tips, and asking him to train her.

(I can vouch for all of what he is saying about all of that.)

Victor: So then when I started letting her know when she was eating something bad for her, all of a sudden I'm disrespecting women?  I'm a personal trainer, it's my wheelhouse.  So don't ask me for advice and then get angry when I give it to you.

Paulie:  You gotta win HoH, Victor.


Yesterday, Nicole and Paul were the only people who were awake in the house for what seemed like hours.  They actually had a good conversation about many different topics.  Here are some tidbits that I can remember about it.

*  Paul brought Nicole coffee to drink while she blew her hair dry.  That hair is A LOT of work, people.

*  Nicole talked to her mom for hours about doing the show this year. She promised that she wouldn't get in any showmances, so she knows her mother is mad at her about that.

*  Nicole didn't even think Corey was cute at first.

*  Nicole has been thinking about her BB16 cast mates, and wondering what they are thinking about her game this summer.

*  Paul wondered what kind of questions the fans will ask, and Nicole told him some of the most common questions, which were all pretty innocuous.  Paul was worried after Paulie told him some of the things Cody has had to deal with, and Nicole admits that guys probably have a different experience than girls do.

(They didn't discuss it here, but apparently Cody had quite a few nutjobs after him, one of whom contacted his folks to ask them to ask Cody to turn on his geotracker on his phone (or whatever) so this guy could find him to beat him up.)

*  Nicole thinks the fans are really going to love Paul, because they really liked Zach.

*  Paul said his girlfriend that he dated for 4 years was 3 years younger than him (he's only 23 now), and that they loved each other, but they grew in different directions.  He still loves her in a way, and would be gutted if something bad happened to her.

*  He discussed his love for the study of Philosophy, and how doing charitable acts is actually not selfless if it makes you happy.  He kept referencing how much he likes to feed homeless people, and how that's not really selfless because it gives him joy.  He gave an example of a guy begging for money, and instead Paul asked him what he liked on his pizza.  The homeless guy said he'd take a slice of whatever Paul bought, but Paul wanted to buy him an entire pie.

*  Nicole wanted to know about falling out of love with someone---can guys ever come back after they've had a break?  I got the impression that Nicole is still hung up over Hayden--she said that after they broke up she was so hurt by him that she thought all of the good in their relationship didn't make up for how badly he hurt her.

After seeing Hayden's cameo appearance on last night's live CBS show, I don't think Hayden will come back, so Nicole will just need to move on from that.  I've heard her say she didn't know him anymore after he cut his hair, and I think we can all agree that we feel the same way, after seeing him on last night's show.

If I could talk to Nicole about all of this, I would tell her to try and think about it as building her Romantic Resume, and realize that you need a few good romances and breakups to be a good lover.  I remember the first time my heart got stomped on hard, in college, I realized that not too many years before that, I was sitting in my room wondering if anyone would ever kiss me, and now here I was with a devastating breakup.

That made it kind of exciting to me, and glamorous.  That doesn't mean I think Nicole should bone Corey on the live feeds, but I think we can all agree that Nicole's Romantic Resume will be more interesting than most other 24 year old girls from Small Town, Michigan.

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