Friday, July 10, 2015

Vanessa: You Can't Beat The House...The House Always Wins. #BB17

Nominations were held today, and were as follows:

Austin - nominated Jason and Meg
Vanessa - nominated James and John

The goal for both of them, of course, is to show the Dreadful Jeff the backdoor this week, although once again most of the house guests  think Audrey might be the backdoor target.  Vanessa and Austin had a few moments alone and she wanted to summarize all of the alliances they are in.  We can believe she's doing it for us, but I'm sure she needs to remind Austin a few times so he doesn't "forget" and make a costly error by saying the wrong thing to the wrong people. Austin notes that he did come up with many of the catchy alliance names, and says this is proof "his creativity is returning".

Vanessa:  Yeah, the thing about this house is that you can't do anything too bad, so you get a chance to clear your head.

(Of the drugs....I mean, allegedly.)

OK.  Here they are:

1.  The House - This is the Final Two deal between Vanessa and Austin.  She says this alliance began the second day in the house, and is the most solid alliance in the game for both of them.

Vanessa:  In my nomination speech, I said I was going to do what The House wants, but you know what that is in poker, right?  The House usually beats the top pair....and has the best odds.  The House always wins...ha ha ha.

Austin likes it.  And he seems to understand it.

2.  Sleeper Cell - This is a big alliance that has been around since the first week of the game, and includes Shelli, Clay, Audrey, Vanessa and Austin.  Vanessa says that things with this alliance get complicated, because they also have a version of Sleeper Cell that excludes Audrey.

3.  Sixth Sense - This alliance is a new one this week, and they expect it to carry them far into the game.  It includes Shelli, Clay, Vanessa, Austin, Liz and Julia.  Vanessa notes that they really need Shelli and Clay to help ensure both Twins come into the game.

4.  Freaks and Geeks - This alliance was formed in the last 24 hours when Steve came to Vanessa with the idea of weaponizing the twins.  He said he thought that twist could be useful due to the extra vote, and wanted to work with Vanessa and Austin.    I believe this alliance includes Vanessa, Austin, Steve, and the Twins.  Vanessa says this is a nice side alliance for them to help ensure the Twins make it until Week #5.

(Note that Vanessa already had a Final Two deal with Steve called Students of Sound (SOS) that she may or may not take seriously, and likely WILL NOT tell Austin about.  It's insurance for her, I'm sure, a little side bet to makes things interesting.)

In this alliance Vanessa proudly says that she is a geek, and always has been.  As is Steve Moses.  Austin is "definitely a freak" and Liz says she is a freak, too.

Liz:  My mom calls me a freak of it fits.

They wondered who is smarter, she or her sister Julia.

Liz:  I am, but we both scored exactly the same on our SATs.

Vanessa, to her credit, did not ask what that score was.  (Vanessa, of course, was valedictorian at her high school and still holds the Duke University record for graduating in 2 1/2 years.)  Both twins went to Loyola, but are not roommates right now.  Julia lives with their older sister (by 10 months) and Liz lives somewhere else.

(Note that I am splicing in some of Liz's comments to punch up this post, but when Austin and Vanessa summarized everything, they were alone because they have certain business that does not include The Twins.)

I did see Vanessa say she needed a drink last night and went to pour a glass of her port wine.  Austin wanted some of that, too.  Vanessa went in the bathroom and turned the sink faucet on full blast for a moment to whisper with Austin, under the pretense of rinsing out the glass before she poured the wine.  (The actions of a frequent hotel traveler....)

While the water was blasting, Vanessa told Austin that she liked Liz, but Liz was understandably immature at times and they would need to discuss some topics without her.  Austin seemed to understand this.  I think he can take direction if told exactly what to do.  Vanessa knows this about him, of course, which is why she picked him for a Final Two.

But is he a Ride or Die Main Apple Scrapple?  I don't think anybody can really answer that but Da'Vonne Rogers.

6.  Vanessa's Angels - This alliance mainly seems to be a fantasy of Austin's, and includes himself, Vanessa, and The Twins.

I don't think that requires too much explanation for you.  Earlier Austin told Vanessa that he promised Jackie he would not put her on the block.

Vanessa:  Why are you saying that? You shouldn't be saying that to anybody right's too early for that!

Austin:  Well, she was sitting there, and she's really nice.

Vanessa:  You and women!  You just can't!

Vanessa said she felt they needed nicknames, and suggested "Twofer" for Liz and Julia, for obvious reasons.  Then Austin came up with calling this HoH reign "Happy Hour" and they liked that.

Vanessa thinks that this Gronk "Party Week" will be a fun one, with no punishments, because he seemed like such a light, happy character.

Austin:  He's a goof.

Well, I have to disagree with Vanessa there.  Gronk says he "likes winners", so that tells me that the losers are going to suffer.  Perhaps with some humiliating punishments.

For example, the Have Not room is free this week....they can use that for solitary confinement.  Or maybe just bring in an evil dentist to yank out some freaking molars.  Oh wait...we already have a dentist in the house....

I don't think this week is going to be a party for everybody....we're all too smart for that, right?  So let's all take this little moment to enjoy being just a smidge smarter than Vanessa Rousso, because we won't feel that way for long.

Liz switched out with Julia last night, and said the guys downstairs are being so mean to her. Jeff keeps firing questions at her about conversations they've had in the house (Jeff:  What's my middle name?") and it's very stressful for her.

Liz:  Before we didn't have to talk about every little thing when we switched, but now it's a problem!

She gives an example of the little Zoo game where they clapped in a circle.  She had no idea what gestures Julia made, and was thankful she guessed correctly when James asked her about it.

Liz:  And did you hear? Jeff told Austin that Johnny Mac is going to start examining our teeth!

(Oh my god.  Ha ha ha ha.)

Vanessa:  Well, you only need to worry about Jeff for four more days. (i.e. till the PoV ceremony).  But you know what?  If that doesn't work out, I wouldn't mind James going home, either.

Vanessa and Liz started talking about all of the wretched comments James says about women, repeatedly and often, without even seemingly realizing it or being concerned about it.

Vanessa:  I was going to take a log of that frozen beef in the DR to talk about how he thinks of women only as meat!  I wanna do that!



*  Please enjoy this memory from BB14, when Dan Gheesling was a captive in the Have Not room for a 24 Hour Dance Party.  I remember that the custom tune Production played almost repeatedly in that room was rather catchy the first 57 times I heard it.

TMZ is on Jeff-Watch, And It's Not Good... #BB17

This is absolutely disgusting.  But that's our Jeff Weldon, CBS' Prime Time Reality Star.

Yep.  You can read the TMZ article here, and all of the comments.

I'm headed off to take a shower now...a Silkwood Shower.

Live Show Wrap Up --Where Do We Go From Here? #BB17

I thought the live show was great last was action-packed and full of suspense.  Sure, the Kathy Griffin Last Laugh Takeover was sort of a flop, but everything else was spot on, including that down-to-the-wire HoH competition.

I have a few comments about the whole thing, as follows.

1.  Da'Vonne went out with class and as expected, got a great crowd reaction.  Julie seemed really into her conversation with Day, and I know Day will think long and hard about what Julie implied...that she should have kept the Twin Twist info to herself.

2.  I'm surprised her baby Cadence wasn't in the audience, because CBS could have just sent a car across town to pick up Da'Vonne's people for the show.  And CBS just loves to have that moment on TV where mother and child are reunited.  (Like Brittany last year.)  Do you think that means that Day might be in sequester, with potential to return to the game?  Not sure, since Julie told her Julia's name and all, but it didn't really feel like Julie gave us closure on this...she usually says we'll see you back here on Finale Night, or that there is a chance to come back in the game.  (At least, I don't remember Julie saying any of that...)  I did think it was hilarious that Da'Vonne said "yep, that's Thickems" right there on the live show, after CBS took such obvious pains to edit out that word from the footage that was aired.  Actually I found it rather shocking that they used "the fat one" as a description right there on prime time TV.  Wow.  Jenny Craig can't be happy about that situation.

3.  Could it be that Production doesn't have closure either?  Until the whole Twin Twist is resolved?   They need to bring another player in based on the timing of the TV schedule, but will it be Julia or an evicted house guest?  Or will they cancel one of the Fast Forwards?  (Or can they just bring Frank Eudy back?)

4.  What in the hell were Becky and Meg wearing last night?  Becky had on some black hoochie shorts and a long brown suede fringed vest.  Does Hollister have a Manson Family line?  Because Becky probably still gets her employee discount there.  And Meg is way too cute to be wearing shorts that are WAY TOO TIGHT and a tacky mesh top live in prime time.  Maybe she needs her gays from home for wardrobe consultation before she really goes anywhere.  Because that was not a cute New York look, Meg. It looked like Kissimmee Florida on a Friday night. (Sorry, Kissimmee.)

(This is off-topic, but if anyone wants to chat about Charlie Manson, I'm all for it. Not to brag or anything, but I'm somewhat of a historian in that area of Americana.  Not a "fan" per se, but someone who knows all about it, and who was once ushered off the premises by security of what used to be 10050 Cielo Drive.  But maybe I've said too much...ha ha ha ha ha)

5.  I think Da'Vonne eliminated the votes of Jackie, Becky, and Jeff because she didn't think she had any chance to sway their votes with her last minute shennanigans she cooked up with Audrey to save herself.  Day had to "lock in" those choices on Wednesday, so she probably thought she still had the chance to work Clay, etc. for a vote to stay.  I'm sure she will discuss that in her eviction interviews, though.  (I hope we get to hear her thoughts on Vanessa's poker career...)

6.  Did you see Devin Shepherd in the front row of the audience?  Looking all smiley and probably smelling like aftershave?  I'm sure you remember last week BB stars Frankie, Jeff & Jordan, and Daniele & Dominic were in attendance.  I doubt they flew anybody out there, but maybe if you're already in the L.A. area and on good terms with Julie Chen you can get that VIP treatment.

FYI----On the BB14 live feeds, Janelle talked about how former house guests used to sit in the audience for the live shows all of the time.  And then something happened that put an end to this for a number of years.  Apparently on the live feeds there was negative discussion about a former house guest, and then that house guest was sitting in the audience on the live show and made some sort of a fuss.  Like talking trash or even making threats to an evictee who was onstage with Julie.  Juicy, right?

You can read my discussion of that situation here, although YouTube has apparently taken down one of the videos that I linked in the post.

7. OK, let's move to Lady Maverick herself, Vanessa Rousso.  Even if Austin is eventually the final HoH after the BoB competition, we all know Vanessa will be running the game this week.  Because, Austin.  They are targeting Jeff, with James as a backup plan, for the following reasons:

*  Jeff's main target is Austin, and has been for some time.
*  Jeff may or may not have intentions of working with Jackie, his former TAR partner.  Vanessa has said that Jackie is the only person in the house whom she can't taking out Jeff would neutralize the threat of that potentially-powerful twosome.
*  Jeff is being VERY aggressive about outing the Twin Twist, and being a real dick about it to those girls.  You may know that Vanessa put together a Final Four deal with Austin and the Twins, with Clay and Shelli along for the ride, so they both need to protect the Twins until Week #5 if they can.  (You can read about the formation of that alliance here, and here.)
*  And Jeff is a dick, big time, but Vanessa is too shrewd to let that be her main reason for backdooring him.  But it is a good reason for the other people to vote for him once he's on the block.

8.  I'm guessing they will try to make Audrey feel like they are doing her a favor by not putting her up in exchange for some promise that they may or may not trust.  Audrey is just floating around now and doesn't have any power or real allies anymore, so there's that.

9.  And when I say "they" in #8 above, I mean Vanessa, of course.  Because as I've now said twice, Austin doesn't have the sense god gave a milk cow.  At least in this game, he doesn't.  When he was talking to Shelli and Clay about the Jeff Situation and the Twin Twist, he admitted that every day in the house he's been too focused about his plans to rehab his damaged hip to notice what is really going on in there.  (Long Hair, Blank Stare.)

10.  And about those Twins....Julie is the one with the birthmark on her back, and maybe the one with the three moles on her face (?).  Shelli is now in charge of helping out with that...either covering up those items or maybe replicating them on the Other Twin.  And they also have a plan to cover the Twin's potential for conversational landmines....whenever a Twin is in a conversation, one of the new alliance is to go in that area and eavesdrop, so they can fill in the Other Twin of any key information that was said.  The New Alliance is really going to try and protect Liz and Julia, and it's going to be fun to watch.  Production must be thrilled with this recent turn of events.

Derrick Levasseur, not so much, because if Vanessa can pull all of this off, she may surpass his great game play last year.  Because Vanessa is playing against some Players this year...except for Austin, of course.  Austin is her Victoria.  And maybe her Cody, too, all wrapped up in one big hairy, mouth-breathing package.

11.  And Meg's good buddy back home is glad that she is safe for another week.  I'm not sure why she says this is a "spoiler", unless Andrea is trying to tell us that she's the one tweeting for Meg this summer.  (If you don't know, Andrea is a two-time Survivor player and former title-holder of RHAP's Miss Survivor pageant.)


I'll just cover this quickly and then I need to move on.  My real life is falling apart over here, for real.  This BB crap is very time consuming!

Last night the house had another "Jeff and Austin Show", but it was clear that there has been intervention from Production.  The house guests were obviously told that the "show" has been way too raunchy to even broadcast on Big Brother After Dark, so they promised to tone it down so BBAD could broadcast it live.  (The usually put on the "show" after midnight, when only the live feeders are watching.  The last show was absolutely FILTHY, and you can read about that here.)

So for this show (Wednesday night) they flipped the script and let Becky and Shelli be the guest hosts, holding a little competition to see which male contestant was the best dater, or something like that.  The male contestants vying to win were Austin, Jeff, and James.  (Why not Clay?)

Austin got all dressed up and everyone made a big deal about how "hot" he looked.  Actually, a turtleneck and jacket is extremely hot for July in California.  Personally I think everyone was exicted that he put some clothes on.  I know I was.  He even straightened his hair.

Austin still thought Jeff was his friend at this point.  Vanessa didn't set him straight with that Come To Jesus Meeting until the next morning.

The funniest part to me was James, as Executive Producer.  He was wearing his little headset made out of aluminum foil and was rushing around trying to get everyone seated and ready backstage, and counting down to airtime.  It really felt like James' job was on the line and they were ready to go live on CBS or something.

Look at him rushing around, calling out orders to get ready on the set.

Now outside the "Cheese Room", where the co-hosts were going over their scripts and primping. James really was on them, counting down to air time.  It was funny.  At one point Jeff did have to tell him, "it's okay if we go live five minutes later....".  (Not sure why they call it the Cheese Room.)

Steve was Security, and you can see his back in the group shot above, wearing the orange vest.  But Steve has zero comic timing and was no fun at all.  At one point they needed "Security" to get involved due to the girls squealing in the Cheese Room, but Steve couldn't improv and seemed irritated that they wanted him to do something.  (I know some of you are Team Steve, but he is No Fun At All on the live feeds, unless you are making fun of him and of course, that is not really fun to watch at all.)

Jeff and Austin kicked off the show by promoting their "sponsors".  Unlike previous "shows", they did not have Trojan condoms and dental dam "live reads" before the broadcast.  (See discussion of "Filthy Show" above.)


Becky and Shelli came out with a burst of energy to host the dating competition.  Becky displayed the "Power of Love" that the winner would receive.

Shelli was FANTASTIC and seemed like a natural in her role as host and also rolling with the punches during the dating interviews.  I don't watch Good Day Atlanta, but maybe there is a role there for Shelli Poole.

So Jackie was the date the other guys "tried out for".  Or whatever.  All I really remember is that the guys had to describe what they would do if they were on a date with a girl and she turned out to be a real nutjob--how would they get out of it?

Both Austin and Jeff gave some version of saying they would text a friend and have them either call or show up at the restaurant to join them, as a distraction and/or a way to gracefully exit the date earlier.  But James....

James:  Well....I would think up a reason to go in the bathroom.....and then I would just get in my car and leave.

Meg was doubled over with laughter at this. Needless to say, Austin ended up "winning".  And it was also uncomfortable to watch Jeff's "dating scenes" with Jackie, due to their TAR history, and the fact that Jeff has been bad-mouthing her to everyone for weeks.

(Jeff:  Dude, I'm so over Jackie.)

Another funny thing...they told James as Executive Producer that they needed him to do a live spot for a sponsor, and then handed him a box of pantiliners.  This was not planned in advance, I don't think.

James:  And ladies, these are pantiliners....for all of your leaky moments.

It was funny.  If this were BBUK, tonight would be chockfull of James' "Best Bits".