Saturday, July 18, 2015

Battle of the Schlock - Smells Like Team Spirit #BB17

I don't even know where to start.  So I'll jump right in.

The Battle of the Block just happened as I start this post, and there is a lot of energy flowing in the house.  All kinds of energy...from the best to the worst.

Jason and John lost, so they are still on the block and Shelli remains the HoH for the week.  The theme of the Battle was 90's music.

 Clay hosted, and I think he wore some type of wig with dreads, in an imitation of the late, great Kurt Cobain.

(And yes I know it's "Teen Spirit". Duh.  I was right there at that time, in the middle of things.  I even hung out in Seattle for about 6 weeks, eating salmon on my expense account and hearing live music in grunge clubs every night.  Alas, I did not get to marry, or even smooch up with Dave Grohl. But we all have regrets in life.)

I guess we can be happy that Clay has a new shirt, such as it is.  Most of Clay's wardrobe was confiscated by Production pre-season, because the team logos and such were not cleared for TV.  So Clay is known as the house thief when it comes to clothes.

He looks like he has Wig Head now, which is like Hat Head but far, far worse.

The group who didn't play is relatively clean and calm.  You can see Meg's sadness here, as she realizes she might lose her friend Jason.  Who knows, maybe she's even realizing that she might need to start flirting with Austin, whose heart easily wanders from damsel-to-damsel.

Oh well. Whatever never mind.

(Hello hello hello hello...)

You can see Audrey sulking in the background already.  Of course.  I'm sure some (other) smart nerd out there in live feed land could create a graph that shows how crazy Audrey gets as we approach the Absolute Value of the PoV each week.  Or something like that.

For the competition, they had to "smash pumpkins", with some potential "shaking" beforehand.  Maybe they had to find the pumpkins containing something and smash them, and the team who wasted the most lost.  But who knows.

(And I love me some Billy Corgan, too.  I can remember being on a first date in a crowded bar when someone cued up "Today" on the jukebox.  Those were the days.)

Somehow the talk turns to how models of ships get into bottles. Vanessa knows that long tweezers are used to actually build the model inside of the bottle and they tease her for knowing that.

Vanessa:  I've never done it, but I know people who do...I wouldn't put it past myself to try it at least once though.

Downstairs, as the losing HoH, Liz (actually it's Julia now) is waiting for the shower.  She got doused with something really, really foul that smells like horse shit.  James (a BoB victor) is already showered, it seems, and is telling Julia that it's okay that he was nominated...he's cool with it.

Julia trudged up to the HoH room to drink the rest of her wine.  When she walks it looks like whatever got spilled all over her is drying and caking, making it hard to walk.  Everyone comments on the not-so-fresh scent.

Julia:  Oh my god it stinks!  But poor Jackie threw up....she actually threw up!

(Julia's voice is NOTHING like Liz's voice, now that I've spent so much time with both.)

The cameras shift quickly to make sure we get a feel for the action right now.

Jason has showered, but is waiting to get in storage to get his "dry mic".  He says that "Liz" can't even get her's.  He is a loser, but seems calm and composed.  Hopefully he is trying to put together an Action Plan.

I think Jason might look better with his shirt off than Austin does....but of course, with Austin, we've all seen way too much.

When Jace was in the house, I heard him put on his Personal Trainer hat and tell Jason that he already has a good body structure...he can easily add on muscle tone whenever he's ready to do that.  Now I get it.

All the mics are labeled, but I don't think Jason's is there yet, but he did find James' mic.

Shelli came in and had a quick moment with Jason, with a colorful array of produce behind her.

(Would it kill Production to get them more bananas?  Clearly that is the most universal fruit in the BB house.)

Jason:  It's okay...I got fired from my job..

Shelli:  What?

Jason:  Well, if I don't show up for work by July 18th, I get fired.  And that's tomorrow, so, with my luck, I'll go home this week and be unemployed

Shelli, filled with sorrow:  Jason...

Jason:  Don't worry...I'm still going to fight tomorrow (for the PoV)

Shelli:  Don't.....there's still....chances...

Jason:  I know.  I'm gonna put on a happy face, but...those pumpkins were no fucking joke.  I was like, how am I going to open these?  And you noticed Jackie had trouble, too.

This is Jason shaking out a white trash bag to put his clothes in.  He said he needed to contain the funky smell because otherwise it would make everyone feel sick.

Jason went upstairs where Julia was in the shower and told her he had a bag for their clothes.

Julia:  I can't get this shit out of my hair!

Jason:  It's foul.  And now we're gonna be doing dance moves all week...just what I need.

As tribute, the cameras follow Jason as he moves through the house, putting Julia's "nasty ass mic" back in the storage room and walking down the hallway.  Production knows we love Jason, and I'm sure they do, too.  He's funny as hell and is someone they can root for, too.

Steve tries to draft off Jason's camera spot, too, waiting for him and following him as he walks through the living room.  He made some sort of compliment to Jason about the competition.

Jason, who DOES NOT like Steve:  Thank you....I tried...those things sure weren't built for someone my size.

We hear Jason go into the bedroom with Steve right on his tail.  Meg is in there, yapping it up.

Meg:  Maybe our takeover this week is a boy band!

Jason:  Oooohhh!  What was the boy band who was on TAR with Jackie?  They're obviously CBS affiliates at this point.

(Jonathon Knight from New Kids of the Block.  It's a huge mental leap for me to go from Nirvana and Smashing Pumpkins to NKOTB, but I can do it if CBS can.)

FISH, based on Jason's comment, I assume.

FYI Yesterday they were discussing the whole boy band idea at the kitchen table, and this happened.

Johnny Mac:  What about Lance Bass?  (pronounced like the guitar, not the fish)

Someone corrected him and Johnny laughed about it.  It was funny.

But Lance Bass is a HUGE BB fan and has even hosted BB reality weekends at his house, where a group of his invited friends came to play a BB type game executed by a company who gets paid to do that.  Dan Gheesling and his wife were invited to play, and Jeff Schroeder was apparently hired by the company to come in and host a competition.

I think Jamie Lynn Sigler won (aka Meadow Soprano, who also loves BB) but I'm not sure.  I know Father Dan did not, and I think his wife Chelsea went farther in the game than he did.

I used to listen to a podcast by one of the guys who was invited to this, so this is how I know.


  1. I have raised my kids on the nineties alternative music. I'm 37, so it was my scene too. My daughter's favorite band is the R.H.C.P. Is Flea too cool to host a takeover? Probably. But how great would that be?
    I agree about Jason without a shirt on. I had to do a double take at that picture. I would definitely rather see a shirtless Jason over Austin any day.
    Jason shouldn't worry about his job. After his stint in the bb house, I'm sure he'll get plenty of offers.

  2. The Twins HoH CD was the Chili Peppers...don't know which one yet, but I definitely gave them a few cool points for that.

    I saw Anthony Keidis at Mama B''s Giant Subs in downtown Orlando one time on my lunch break. I was facing him from where I sat and once I recognized, him, I could no longer chew and swallow my sandwich. I had to take it to go!

  3. All about the 90's music... I'm 36 and spent some time in Seattle back in the day ;)

  4. And beyond grunge....The Counting Crows...The Cranberries....Bjork....Beck....the list goes on and on...

    Even kind of jokey bands like the Crash Test Dummies and James were good...


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