Monday, July 7, 2014

Wil Heuser Does It Again - The Saga Episode 2 #BB16

Wil is right on point here, with Donny narrating the story, which includes a tender rendition of Caleb and Amber's love story.

Until Caleb goes nuts, of course.

Enjoy, BB fans.  We love you Wil!

(There seem to be some linking problems with the video right now---it doesn't even seem to be on You Tube but I'm sure it will be up and running soon.  I'll check back later...)

Can Celeb Hear the Truth? #BB16

Caleb and Devin were just sitting on the backyard couch and Devin went through the roster of house guests, counting all of the votes to evict Zach.

Caleb asked him specifically about Cody's vote.  Devin told him that Cody hated to vote out his friend, but he said he would vote Zach out and would not go against the alliance.

Cody came outside and went to the hammock.  Caleb started walking over there and Devin told Caleb not to go over there.  Devin kept calling out for Caleb to come back, but Caleb kept walking and got in the hammock with Cody.

Caleb asked him what he thought about the whole thing.  Cody told him that he couldn't vote Zach out because Zach was his friend, even though he didn't agree with everything that Zach did today.

Cody:  I told Devin that..

Caleb:  Whatever you do, just keep in mind the people who are working with you..think about your alliance..

Cody: Oh, you don't need to tell me that.  I know...

Caleb:  I trust you 100%.

(Cody is turning into a good little liar, isn't he?)

Devin's Motor Mouth Cranks Up #BB16

Devin just marched Hayden up the stairs to the HoH Suite and made a long-winded invitation to the Bomb Squad.  He does the math and says that if Hayden joins, they are eight strong and this is the safest way to ensure he makes the Jury.

Devin counted the votes to evict Zach, and didn't even want to hear Caleb's comments about it.  (SHOCKER.)  He counted Derrick, Brittany, and Christine among the people who would be voting to evict Zach, and Hayden maintained a straight face throughout.

Devin wants to stop all of this personal stuff from coming into the game and makes the pitch again.  The first time, Hayden said that today was just so crazy, and every single person in the house is trying to talk to him today, and he and Nicole feel like they got dragged into this whole mess.

Hayden:  I still like you guys as people.....we'll be friends after this...the weak people need to go first, and I think everybody agrees about that...

Caleb joined in to try and close the deal, asking Hayden wouldn't it be great for him to get to the end and have all of his alliance members in the Jury voting for him?  Caleb quickly adds that Hayden would be there because he earned it, too.

During the meeting Devin grabbed the SpyScreen remote and focused on the living room, pointing at people and counting out loud who the alliance members are.

I never heard Frankie say one thing during the meeting.

Devin said what happened today was an aberration, and a disgrace.  Now he says Zach was begging him to get put on the block, so that is why he nominated him.

He also refers to Brittany as a valuable alliance member.

Aftershocks From the ZachQuake #BB16

I'm still surfing around, surveying the damage from Zach's Bomb Squad explosion during the PoV Ceremony.

A group has gathered in the bathroom, talking about what happened.  Frankie came in acting forlorn so Derrick hugged him, saying "what's wrong?"

Ha ha ha.  Derrick is so low key.

Outside Zach was talking to Hayden.  He and Nicole got dragged into the whole mess because they were in the HoH room with Devin and Amber when Devin told them Paola was going to throw the BoB competition and that Hayden and Nicole would win easily.

Cody still looks good, so don't worry about that.  He suffered no physical damage as a result of today's explosive meeting.

Zach talked again with Frankie and said he did apologize for pointing at him during the meeting and saying his name.  That is the one part of his speech that he regrets, he says.

Devin is in a zombie-like state, and is talking to Jocosta.

Jocosta has her Bible in her hand and is telling Devin that she is proud that he kept it together when Zach brought his daughter into it today.  She doesn't think she could have remained calm if someone brought up her children like that.

Amber is trying to do major damage control now, to distance herself from Devin controlling her nominations and her knowledge of the PoV-throwing controversy. 

Paolo wishes she had listened to Brittany when Brittany told her that she couldn't trust Devin.  I think she realized that Brittany was half nude, so she shed a layer in a haughty fashion in an attempt to keep up.  You go, Pao Pao.

Because Amber is denying that Nicole and Hayden were told about Paolo rigging the competition, Nicole is upset and says she feels like she needs to clear her name now,and she didn't do anything but try to win the competition.

Derrick:  Amber's going to follow you guys around all day trying to deny it.

Derek says he believes Hayden...he has to because Hayden is from Boston and they have that connection.

Look at Brittany, strutting her stuff like a boss, and in HDTV too.  We should all drop down and do 20 push ups right now, out of respect.

Brittany said to Frankie that it's clear that it's going to be the three of them (Caleb, Devin,Amber) against everyone else, and that Frankie is just going to have to choose a side.

A few minutes later, Hayden and Frankie had a moment alone to chat.  Hayden is upset that he got dragged into the whole mess.  (I'll bet he is, because he was trying to coast as long as he can.)

Frankie:  What are we going to do now?

Hayden:  Well, we've got to get Devin and Caleb out...

Frankie:  But what about this week?

Hayden:  We can't get them out this week.

Frankie:  But WHO DO WE EVICT this week.

Hayden:  Oh. .....  I don't know.

He says they should keep Zach, since Zach is willing to battle Devin and Caleb.  This isn't the answer that Frankie wanted to hear, I don't think.


Frankie is still trying to end EVERY conversation with EVERYONE by saying "I love you!"  That just sounds so false now, and desperate.

You can't love everyone. Otherwise you can't really love anyone, right?

Today''s Drama Brought to You By Zach Rance #BB16

I don't know about you, but I am THRILLED to have some excitement in the house that is game-related, rather than being about Devin's daughter or Caleb's scary obsession with Amber.

Thank you Zach!

Zach's Speech Rocks the Foundation #BB16

Zach is in a jubilant mood.  He stayed up all night with Cody and Brittany, and then finally ate some slop in the form of a pancake a few hours ago.

Then he went into the PoV meeting and BLASTED Devin.  From what I could gather, he threw Caleb and Frankie under the bus, probably letting Devin know that they were also guilty of talking trash about Devin.

Paolo lost her cool after Zach called her a liar.  She claims that Devin asked her to throw the PoV and he would save her.  She is pissed now because she says she didn't throw it, but Devin didn't save her with the PoV even though he got the result he wanted.

I'm jumping around from Camera to Camera so I can get a flavor for what the impact of all of this is.

Derrick is sporting a different look today, and says that the only regret he has about Zach's actions is that they won't be able to air all of it, due to the profanity.

Derrick:  Otherwise, they would have shown that whole thing....

Apparently Zach gave a shout out to "Gator Nation" and Derrick chuckles about this.

Zach is telling everyone Devin is a lying sack of shit.

Zach:  What a fucking joke he is...calling a fucking house meeting and crying about his fucking integrity!

In The Hive, Caleb and Cody spoke with Frankie, who is still affecting the "hurt little boy" persona.  Apparently Frankie asked Cody if it is true that he and Derrick didn't trust him, anyway.

Cody:  I can't recall saying that specifically....there have been a lot of conversations...

I don't know what Nicole had to say, but I know her fans like to see her, so here she is.  I think I heard her cursing, though, which is great.

Paola is venting with Brttany, saying that she's going home now, and that it isn't fair, blah blah blah.

I have to say Brittany has balls, man, to have the confidence to stroll around in a bikini like that, in front of all of these young girls.  She puts most of them to shame, I have to say.

Back in The Hive, Frankie and Caleb are alone and Frankie asks what are we going to do now?

Caleb:  Oh, he'll get his...Zach just pissed me off...and he'll know...he's going to have to beat me in something to get me out of here.

Frankie:  We have to figure out a way to get him out this week though.

Caleb:  And Zach started bringing in his daughter, and all of the pills he's's just all too much.

(I am literally shaking with laughter as I type.)

Caleb:  I don't want him to talk to me....I don't want him to look at me...

Frankie gets up to leave, and then this happens.

Caleb:  I confronted Amber, too....

(OMG I wish we could see the whole PoV meeting but we never will.....)

Zach Takes a Seat #BB16

As expected, Devin used his PoV to remove Britney from the block, and replaced her with Zach Rance.

FYI:  Zach wanted Devin to put him on the block, so that he could put the Bomb Squad on blast.

And it sounds like the Bomb Squad blew the fuck up.

Jocosta was surprised to hear Devin say that Zach told him he wanted to go home.  Zach told her that he told Devin that so he would nominate him, so he could expose the lies.

Poala wonders if all of that is going to be on TV.

Jocosta:  Yes, Girl!

I'm sure Jocosta is loving all of this because she hasn't had to do one thing yet.  (Don't forget that Andy Herren was barely on the CBS show for at least a month last year...)

Frankie is very upset, saying that Zach threw him under the bus during his speech.  He doesn't even want to talk to Zach right now.  Ordinarily I would be overjoyed at this news, but I wonder how the  (Damn) America's Team is going to interfere with Frankie getting what should be coming to him.

Frankie:  I was your friend...I had your back...

Zach:  I'm still your friend.  I still have your back...If you get to the end you're getting my vote.

Frankie:  But Cody and Derrick won't even fucking look at me...

Zach:  They didn't trust you any way...believe me, nothing got broken there...

As Frankie left the room Brittany was coming in a bright pink bikini and Frankie put on a little show for her.

Frankie, in a small voice:  I just don't understand why you did that...

Zach apologizes if it came off the wrong way, and says he threw Caleb under the bus, too.

Paola and Zach met in the storage room and we finally get to see the firey spitfire that we've been waiting for.  She was all pumped up and cursing about Devin.  During her speech, she made a comment about how she'd rather go stick her head in that fake toilet then to spend another day with Devin in the Big Brother house.

Paola:  Should we throw away his protein powder?

Zach:  No.  Because I'm a Have Not and I need that this week.

Paolo:  Oh

As they left the room they were hugging and Zach said to please campaign for him to stay this week.

Zach:  I'll fucking put you on blast on my Facebook...I'm coming to all of your shows.

No sign of Devin or Caleb on the live feeds yet..

Meet Team America #BB16

When BBAD kicked off last night, the show opened with Donny, Derrick and Frankie talking by the free weights in the backyard.  The audio was terrible, so I wondered why we were watching this, and not something more compelling, like, say, a half-naked Cody.

Then Derrick said:  America has chosen...

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this is your team.  Behold America's Team.

Donny:  Did ya'll go to the board and look?

Derrick:  Yeah...I had my ideas, but...

Frankie:  Yeah, I looked.  I had you pegged (indicating Donny), and either you (Derrick) or Christine..also because of the order that we got called in....

Derrick says they will need to talk more about it tomorrow, and even though they have other relationships in the house, they need to be sure the others stay because every time they "do what America tells them" they win $15,000 to share.

Derrick:  And none of us are targets right now....

Donny says it is rare to get an "outside feed" when you're playing Big Brother.

Derrick:  We'd be the biggest idiots not to do this...they just told us who we can as far as I"m concerned we're the last three...

Derrick said he wanted to get out of the DR as quickly as possible, since there were a lot of people around, but he can't thank America enough for giving him this opportunity.

Donny says their group has it all---they've got a brain in Derrick, a performer in Frankie, and if you need a beard, he's got one.

The conversation broke up when Caleb came over to discuss how they should shave or style Donny's beard.

I have mixed feelings about this.  I think Derrick had a good thing going in this game and I'm worried that this America's Team might mess things up.

CBS obviously wanted America to choose Donny, since they crafted two consecutive episodes that were all Boo Hoo Donny is Different....I thought they were embarrassing to watch but the TV show isn't aimed at me, or any of the live feeders, really.

And Frankie?  I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him.  I have heard him trash talk about just about everyone but Christine, and he doesn't seem to be telling us the real story in the DR.  He's just playing up to the cameras most of the time.  Frankie is an interesting person, because under all of the glitter and manic energy, I think he is a very sad person and you can see it in his face sometimes.

I wonder what their tasks will be...will they be game-related like trying to influence someone's nominations or votes?  Or pranks like putting hot sauce in the peanut butter or mayonnaise inside Devin's shoes?

Let's take another look at Derrick.  I'm hoping his glasses are real, unlike the frames that Caleb has been wearing, which don't EVEN HAVE GLASS IN THEM.


I asked Derrick's wife Jana if the glasses are real, and she says Derrick has perfect 20/20 vision so the glasses are just for show.  We agreed that unlike Caleb, Derrick doesn't look like a douche wearing them.


I've told this story before here, but a few years ago I may or may not have made out with the "Can you hear me now?" guy near the sports betting window in the New York Casino in Las Vegas.

And by "may or may not" I meant that I did, but he may not have actually been that guy.  He said he was, and he looked like it, so that is what is important here.