Sunday, July 22, 2012

Operation Apple Crisp #BB14

is the dish that Janelle and Ashley are cooking up.  Janelle also wants to make sugar cookies for Frank and maybe spell his name out with them.

(His birthday coming up, I guess?)

Janelle is cursing because the plastic knife is "so shitty" and is peeved that they don't have an apple corer.  They are wasting so much of the apple.

Janelle describes her dish as making an "apple pie without the crust". She just announced to Joe that they are making apple crisp.  Janelle wants to use real butter.

They are getting a work out trying to saw away at those apples with a butter knife and that green plastic chef knife.

Glamour Queen #BB14

Janelle looks so glamorous sitting on the patio.  You'd never know she is listening to Britney describe how she found an "artery" in her meal at a restaurant, and her annoyance at not having her meal comped by management.
Britney just gave us her recipe for some sort of chicken casserole that involved chicken, Ritz crackers, butter and sour cream.

 I guess that sent Janelle right back into the house, where she helps Ashley peel some green apples.  Maybe a pie is in the works?  Or a cobbler?

Janelle misses music and wishes they could sing in the shower.  If the two of them win the $500K and the $100K prizes, Janelle says they will get a limo, a bunch of Dom Rose to drink, and they will go to the Drake concert.

Ashley better put some lemon juice on those apples before they turn brown.

Conversational Tidbits #BB14

1.  Dan is allergic to imitation crabmeat and aspirin.

2.  Ian "frickin' loves" tiramisu, but his mother hates it.

3.  Ian is preparing to eat a pudding Snack Pack.  Britney had one earlier, and loved it.

4.  Ian recommends Frank try the tiramisu at the Macaroni Grill, after struggling to rememeber the name of the restaurant.  Frank has never tried tiramisu.

5.  Britney likes to eat at the Shogun at the Tulsa mall.  Danielle chimes in that she "loves Shogun".

6.  Britney was a Kappa Kappa Gamma, and can sing the song of every sorority.

7.  Britney guesses Frank weighs 192.  He says that is a good guess and may be accurate as of today, but he weighed 185 when he came in the house.

8. Mike Boogie has no food allergies, and weighs 177.

9.  Ian weighed 114 after his first week on slop, but now weighs 120 after being able to eat real food for a few days.

10.  Dan is 5'9" and weighs 140.  He thinks he represents an average US man with those stats.

11.  Britney is very competitive about guessing weights, and gloats about how close she is.  (I wish she would guess the girls' weight, to start a little trouble.)

12.  Frank plans to eat some banana puddin' tonight.  The pizza in the fridge is "killin' him", but I don't know if that is a good or bad thing.

Shane and Ian Play Ball #BB14

I think this is Bocce Ball, but I'm not sure.  It sounds like the two of them may be on a team, opposing Dan and Mike.   If you can see past Shane in the first picture, you can clearly see Ian walking on his tippytoes.

The girls outside lay and bake in the sun, while Janelle snacks in the kitchen.

Jenn and Wil are laying out together, whispering mad game about "breaking up that little pack".

Brandon Hantz Takes the Stage #BB14

Brandon Hantz has a regular YouTube series called 'Enhantzed', apparently.  Although I don't want to publicize Brandon's business ventures, I feel I must cover it today as this episode concerns Willie Hantz' ejection from the Big Brother 14 house.

That is Russell Hantz who is sitting with Brandon below---they spoke with Willie over the phone.  We also see Russell doing some sort of reenactment of Willie's "episode" in the house, complete with door-kicking.  It is amazing how much alike they are---I think they could be twins.

Brandon invites Willie to "enhantz" them on the facts.  Willie starts talking about "how close" he and Britney are, and he hopes she doesn't hold anything against him after all of this.  He says Britney was "forced to tell her team to separate from Willie" and so Willie decided to "be the person everybody thinks he is".  He "became a character" and went to the HOH room and then "his pride got in the way and he did something he didn't want to do". 

So his position appears to be that he did not want to leave.  Apparently he called someone "a vagina".  Willie starts giving a play-by-play of the fight, but to be honest it is unclear what really happened.  Brandon and Russell push him on the details and Willie says that Joe "put his dukes up".  Willie does not cop to doing anything except "putting his head to my head".

Look, I'll be honest.  This video is over 12 minutes long.  You can click the button below and watch it, but you'll never get that 12 minutes back.  I recommend you multi-task while you watch it, maybe reconcile your checkbook or something so something productive comes out of this.

Spoiler:  Willie is pulling for Ashley to win.  (JoJo may blow when she hears that, huh?)

I think the Hantz Brothers may be the new Kardashians.  When you think about it that way, it's not so bad.

Big Brother After Dark - After the POV 7-22-12 #BB14

This episode was filmed on Saturday night at 9:00 pm BBT.  The POV competition was held earlier in the day, with Shane winning the competition for the second straight week.

OK.  Here we go with the major highlights and other assorted minutia from the live Showtime camera shot.

1.  Ashley, Joe and Janelle walked methodically across the backyard, back and forth.  Janelle touches the wall on the far side before turning, like a swimmer pushing off from the pool.  Ashley broke off to stretch and Joe and Janelle started whispering about how hard it is going to be to evict Frank.  Janelle thinks they need to strike first.  Joe is walking barefoot.

2.  Wil told a few people that he did a "half triathalon", but then seemed confused when trying to define exactly what that was.

3.  Ashley feels like she has gained a ton of weight in the house, around her belly.  She is scared to wear a bikini tomorrow.  Danielle is bigger, too, and points out her arms are bigger.  Ashley says that the competitions are not easy, and although the POV may have looked easy, she was winded.  And was not going fast.  She got three wrong.  Danielle encourages her and says it is okay because she was smiling the whole time.  Ashley murmurs to Danielle that she feels so left out from Joe and Janelle's conversation.

(Ashley is playing the game in a sly way.)

4.  The HG who didn't play in the POV got to drink margaritas.  Danielle says "Boogie was downing them". 

5.  Janelle came over to stretch with the girls.  She hurt her knees in the Coach's Challenge--there was some sort of bar between their knees the whole time and Ashley says they were bent over.  Janelle needs to work out hard tomorrow because she "just ate a whole stick of butter with that spinach".  You can really hear Minnesota in her voice when she says that. Mike says his knees don't hurt.

6.  They watch Wil run across the back yard.  Ashley watches Wil eat and says he never has any sugar at all, and puts together "perfect little meals" everyday.  She even notices that he doesn't drink much coffee.

(She's playing all right.)

7.  Shane, who never talks, mentions watching Jessie Godderz and something about him being in the house "for like, 13 hours".

8.  Jenn jokes about Showtime After Dark after JoJo starts talking about faking orgasms in front of an easy audience of Frank, Ian, Shane and Joe.  (JoJo:  Look at me, look at me!)  The camera changes on that.

9.  Janelle and Danielle decide to play with eye makeup so they go inside the house to get started.  They discuss the votes that Danielle needs to stay.  Janelle says they should talk after the POV ceremony, but she thinks it will be okay.  Danielle grabs her back fat in disgust.  Janelle has it to, from having a baby but knows she needs to lay off the creamed spinach.

Janelle:  I'm just so friggin pumped that Willie is gone! Aren't you?

10.  Janelle looks for her Chanel make up and says all of the Mary Kay make up is her's.  Danielle doesn't know that Janelle sells Mary Kay so Janelle explains it is her "little home based business".  They start trashing Frank, saying he gets weirder every day.  (Janelle is working the game, too.)  They say Frank is pissed that Shane is coming off the block.  Janelle advises to stay calm, and not talk about it yet.

11.  They decide to do funky eye makeup and neutral lips.  Janelle says they are going to be "totally 80's" and are going to have funky hair too.  Danielle says she has had a different hairstyle every time she goes in the DR.  Janelle and Ashley are getting all made up and want to do a "Trixie and Pixie" Dr session together.  Frank watches from the couch in the bathroom and says he is going to go to bed early.

 ***continue reading after the jump***

Ted's Up, Too #BB14

In case you were wondering.  I'll just say it:  I hope Ted wins.  Yeah, that's right.  He's the only one in that whole damn house who can keep a secret.


Shane Oversees the Shower Activity #BB14

and is still having trouble moving around.  His lower back hurts, apparently.

JoJo just got out of the cold shower (Have Not) after shaving her legs.

Ashley gets ready to work out and tells Shane she is proud of him (for winning the POV yesterday).  He thanks her, and then struggles to get up and go to the sink.  Looks like Shane is wearing pink Underoos today.

Now an indoor lockdown is called.  Jenn is in the kitchen telling what I'm sure was an interesting story about Jodie Foster.  Then she says she has a good story about Whitney Houston and BB lets us hear some of it.

Whitney called Jenn and "screamed at her because she thought Jenn called the press and told them she was in Sicily".  She blamed her and then asked for someone else.

JoJo brushes her teeth and the cameras keep an eye on things.

Shout Outs on the Patio #BB14

Mike Boogie started to give a morning shout out to "Dr. Will Kirby and Cash Kirby" and we go to FISH.  When we come back, Jenn is doing a list of shout outs a mile long that have to do with musicians she knows in NY.  She directs us to check out the music of a few of them and they all laugh at how detailed the names are.

Britney:  I couldn't even remember all of those words!

For example, one was Deleria (?), and Bound by Substance, and the list goes on and on.  She had a late addition that she forgot about that is a band she played bass for on their album.

Jenn:   Much love!

Everyone laughed.   Britney had a shout out too, but the FISH wouldn't let us hear it.

Jenn talked about her DJ business this morning and said she could play DMX in a metal club and everybody would jump up and say "Hell Yeah".  They talked about Ludacris and his Welcome to Atlanta song and Britney brings up the remix.

Britney also likes TI and Jenn does to.  Britney also used to be a Ja Rule fan and likes his raspy voice.  Frank said one of the rapppers called out the 901 area code and everybody in Memphis was pumped about it.

They discussed American Idol and Mike already knew that Jennifer Lopez would not be returning.  Jenn said she loves Ellen Degenerus (sp?) but she didn't do very well on American Idol.

Frank:  Yeah, she can dance around on her show all day long, but that don't mean she knows about singin'!

Then Frank admits he has never seen her show and they all laugh.

They can hear someone beating on something in the distance, over the wall, and Wil tries to do his little "Victory Dance" to the rhythm.