Monday, July 5, 2010

New Ways for Me to Goof Off

The season hasn't even started yet and I am already finding new ways to waste precious pre-season time cyber-stalking the HG online. hasn't put all of the interviews out online yet---as of now I am all caught up on those.  But I did some poking around, and I found some information on the SurvivorSucks BB message board about one of my personal frontrunners, Matt Hoffman.  I wrote about Matt a few days ago, and I thought he was going to be my favorite and go far in the game, but the learned folks on that damned, snarky message board kind of got to me.

They seem to think Matt is the Saboteur, and that he is some sort of Reality Show Whore.  For example, Matt was previously a contestant on Average Joe 4.  Well, what the fuck is Average Joe 4, you might ask?

Wikipedia tells us this about the topic:

Average Joe: The Joes Strike Back

The fourth season entitled Average Joe: The Joes Strike Back started airing on June 28, 2005. The name references Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back. In this season, one rejected Joe from each week received a complete makeover and the opportunity at another chance with the show's beauty Anna Chudoba. In the end, Anna chose Average Joe Nathan Griffin over model/bartender Rocky Fain, breaking the 'Joes' losing streak. A contestant on Average Joe: Hawaii, Alfred LaPonza 'Fredo', along with two other men, sued NBC claiming the network used ideas of theirs on the show.

and this:

GSN had acquired the first two series in 2004, but the network no longer airs the show. Episodes can now be seen on the Fox Reality Channel.

How in the world did Matt get involved with this crap? Here is the link to his show profile.  This is the Pre-Tatt Matt.  Is Matt nerdy enough to be a contestant on this show?  I thought it was for Revenge of the Nerd types, but maybe I'm wrong.

I guess being a BB fan means having your heart broken from time-to-time......

And So It Begins......

The HG make their way into the house on July 3rd........

Preseason Spotlight - Andrew Gordon

I am kicking off my day by watching Andrew's preseason interview with Chelsea Hart on  Andrew is a 39 year-old podiatrist from Miami Beach.  Yes, yet another person with proven intellectual firepower.  Med school is hard, my friends.

But having said that, before I watched the interview, I watched the little "You Ask, They Tell" feature on  Someone with the screen name TiggerPooh (and a few more letters) asked a question and in response Andrew addressed him as Tiger Pooh Pooh.(**Alert Alert Alert**)

Now, would that indicate a reading disability? Lack of focus?  Lack of familiarity with the the Hundred Acre Woods?  Maybe humor?  I'm moving on, but filing this away for the future.  Book Smarts do not always equal Common Sense.

My impressions and opinions of Andrew:

1.  He has a 9 year old daughter and likes to go to Toys R Us with her.  However she is not allowed to buy dolls or anything pink.  He has "a thing" about being a bachelor with dolls and stuff in the house. (**Alert  Alert Alert**)

2.  He is a big fan of BB and overanalyzes every season.  He doesn't like HG who ride coattails or play under the radar.  He wants the best player to win.

3.  He sent in a tape 3 months ago and then started the interview process from there.  He gave a shout-out to Chelsea since he is a fan.  She is giggling now.

4.  His daughter is in camp and wasn't told that Daddy was going on the show beforehand.  He knows that kids have a hard time keeping a secret so he didn't tell her.  They watched the show together last year ("fastforwarding through the naughty parts") and he told her about the need to lie for strategy to win a game like that.  So he is clearing himself for bad behavior.  (PS:  No questions or talk about his daughter's mother.  All I can guess there is that it is a bad situation and he can't mention her.  If the daughter was adopted, wouldn't he just say it?)

5.  If he wins HOH, he is nominating the "idiot smoker" first, then probably the airhead blonde who cares more about how she looks then what she does.

6.  He is a poker player and thinks he can use this to his advantage---reading people.

7.  He is afraid of "a beautiful woman who can control him".  He says that unless they are Jewish he will not have a romance with them and doubts that BB would put another Jew in there.  (Don't they do that all the time?)

8.  His charity is some sort of Hai Hotline (?) which helps Jewish kids, as well as paying for his daughter's education.  He also wants to go to Vegas with $10K and jokes that if he wins and Chelsea is still talking to him, he will take her with him.  Lots of giggles from Chelsea on that.

9.  He usually plays in the WSOP every year in Vegas and one of his friends is planning to go and meet Andrew there.  He will be surprised that Andrew will not be able to make it but hopefully he will understand.

10.  He names Marvin from BB5 as one of his favorite players.  Andrew just scored some points for that from me.  (Marvin's "Honey Bear" story is still one of my all time favorites from the seasons.)  He also scored big with Chelsea because when she first asked him who his favorite BB players were, he said "'s Chelsea!"  in a flirtatious way and she loved that.  He gave Holly BB5 as an example of one of the materialistic bubble head blondes that he can't stand.  He also named Chicken George as someone he liked watching because of his carefree attitude.  I must take a half-point deduction for that answer, Andrew.

11.  When Chelsea asked about Janelle, he said she was a different kind of blonde who was intelligent and a great player.  He thinks the two of them would have teamed up in the house.

12.  I guess what is most different about Andrew is the fact that he plans to keep kosher in the BB house and will observe the Sabbath, not taking part in events and competitions that conflict with this.  Alison Grodner did a pre-season interview and said this is the first time that they have had a contestant like this, and that Andrew knows that they won't change the rules for him.   So.....I guess this means that when they have any Eating Gross Foods competitions or Saturday competitions, he won't participate?  Isn't Saturday the holy day for kosher people?  I think this is really going to be unfair for him and BB must be taking it into consideration for the season.

13.  Unless.....Andrew is the Saboteur.  Then that might make sense, because his goal would not be to win the show, but to score cash wreaking havoc.  And someone as smart as Andrew might be able to really do a number on the other HG.  I thought he seemed really boring at first, but then when he was flirting with Chelsea you could really see a confident brand of charm that can drop panties.  Seriously.

14.  He also doesn't seem to be the type who is going to stress that he is a doctor over and over and over again.  That is the sign of someone who has been on the smart side of things their entire life and doesn't need to constantly point it out.  (Ahem....let's just say I'm no dummy myself....)

15.  Didn't Kaysar eat Kosher sometimes in the house?  I seem to remember that BB got him some special kind of meat when he was HOH and somebody left his meat out on the counter overnight and King Kaysar lost his shit over that.  (Andrew also called out Kaysar as a player he hoped to be like---I hope he meant that Kaysar didn't compromise his religious beliefs and that is what he admires, not Kaysar's game play.  Kaysar was HORRIBLE at the BB game.)

16.  I lived on Long Island for a few years in the late 90's, and I was amazed by all of the rituals and products that become available during the Jewish holidays.  Whole aisles of the supermarket were transformed into Kosher aisles.  Families had to buy new dishes and silver to use during Passover--they couldn't use their old "unclean" kitchen items during the Holy Time.  Most mainstream consumer products had a "Kosher for Passover" edition of their products, even Coca-Cola.

17.  So keeping Kosher is going to be a huge production for Andrew.  I kind of like him now and am calling off my ealier **Alert** on him for the time being.  I'm not sure if he is going to hang with the other guys as "Bros" or not.  He is definitely one of the oldest so he needs to fit in where he can.

If someone has a corn or bunion in the BB house, this would be the season for it to occur, wouldn't it?  Even an ingrown toenail can be easily disposed of by Dr. Gordon.  If Andrew lasts for at least a month on that show, he is going to be INUNDATED with inquires from single Jewish girls.

Mazel, Andrew.  (If I am using that correctly.  If not, I blame my TV friend Andy Cohen.)