Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Clean Up on Camera 3 - It Will Take More Than a Mop To Clean Up Da'Vonne's Mess #BB17

These pictures are all yesterday's news.  I was getting ready to write the post yesterday when the whole Twin Twist started blowing up.  I ended up being so disgusted with what I was seeing (and NOT seeing) that I just kind of gave up. 

Why should I work so hard when the effing house guests are behaving like the Three Stooges?  Why should we care so much about people who are not capable of organizing a two-camel caravan?

But I do.  And we do.  So I will go on. But in protest, I will mix in some of the later news with earlier news.  Because I'm a rebel like that.  I'm probably going to be mean and might YELL, too, so there's that.

OK. As the day started, the house guests knew they had to start getting ready for the PoV ceremony.  Meg was freezing cold in the Have Not room so she came outside to simmer in the hot tub before braving the cold shower.

Clay came out, and apparently thought he was going to lay down some smooth action on Meg, trying to butter her toast before his Fauxmance Shelli tells her to take a seat in the nomination chair.


But Meg is no dumbass.  No, Meg lives in New York City and can see Clay coming from half a block away.  She tells Jason, who is sitting on the couch and smoking (of course) that she knew something was up when Clay tried to "come up and snuggle on her".  She flat out told Clay that she knows he's trying to sweeten her up for what is to come.


Well, there's not much Clay could say about that.  And let me point out that when this BB week started, before Clay and Shelli came down with a gargantuan case of tandem HoH-itis, Shelli made it clear that she wanted EVERYONE to think that she was going to backdoor Audrey this week....she wanted NO ONE to know that her true target was Da'Vonne.

Clay, to EVERYONE:  Shelli's target is Da'Vonne!

Shelli, to everyone but NO ONE:  My target is Da'Vonne, ya'll!

Us:  HA HA HA HA HA.


His work done, Clay moseyed back up to the HoH suite to congratulate himself for a job poorly done.  And because I like Meg, I deleted the picture that showed her wrapping herself in a towel because there was visible cellulite on her backside.  I was feeling charitable yesterday, because theoretically we are all human.

Even Jeff, who came outside and saw Meg in the hot tub and gave her what I think was intended to be a Sexy Look.  If you don't know, Jeff is an ASS and lets us know that on a daily basis.  He has made incredibly tasteless comments about double-teaming A Twin in the Jury House with Clay, as well as making disparaging comments about Jackie on a regular basis.  On the flip side, Jeff seems to be very smart, and knows how to sweet talk when he wants to.  So we can all expect Jeff to be successful in life...sad but true.

(I think we can all agree that if Jeff wins BB17, it may be the worst win since A. Baller in BB9.)

Jeff is playing all sides now, and appears to be getting away with it.  Incredible!

FYI Jeff and his ex-girlfriend applied to be on The Amazing Race together after talking to someone named "Adam" in casting.  Jeff made his ex sound like a complete control freak, saying she insisted on hiring someone to film and edit an application video for them.  After they sent in the tape, "Adam" contacted them to say the tape was good, but they missed the deadline to appear on that season.

FISH shut down this conversation, but from the bits and pieces I've heard previously, Jeff was contacted by TAR after he broke up with his ex, and yadda yadda yadda he appeared on the blind date season, teamed up with Jackie.  The girls thought it must have been horrible for Jeff's ex to see him on TAR with a blind date.  I think it must have been horrible for Jeff's ex, period.

Jeff, to the guys:  Dude, I'm so over Jackie.


Shelli got ready for the PoV ceremony, and had her game face on.  She probably thought she was about to pull the Move of the Century, creating Shock and Awe when she nominated Meg instead of Audrey.

Shelli and Clay have been bickering here and there, mostly about his offhand comments to her about her body and diet habits.  Apparently he was "joking" earlier this week and said something about her "withering body".  The girls in the house had to tell Clay that he should NEVER make comments like that to a woman, and Clay was "surprised" by that.


How great would it have been if Shelli had nominated Clay instead of Meg?

Ha ha ha.  She could have been America's SweetTart, and everyone would have loved it.


The Julia Twin was in the house, and approached Meg to tell her not to be worried about going up on the block, and that everyone had her back.  Meg appreciated this gesture, and admitted the stress and anticipation of going on the block was making her week as a Have Not even worse.


So I'm sure you know that later in the day, Da'Vonne figured out the Twin Twist and used some HORRIBLE judgement in dealing with that information.  But more on that later.

This Twin is Julia, now known as the Skinny Mean Twin.  But I'm sure Julia would like that moniker better than what Liz is being called.  Because when Da'Vonne was presenting her evidence to Jason to support her Twin  Twist theory, she referred to Liz as "the heavy set one", and "the chunky one".  She also said that Julia's face is even thinner, and that Liz has a "pie face", and that a Pony Tail Error is what set her brain in motion about this twist. Please note that now over half of the house has settled on "Thick'ems" as a "secret code name" for Liz.

As if to prove our point, when Meg approached Julia in the bathroom, she even commented that "Liz" always looked so hot when she wore jeans.  Well of course she does, Meg, because that is Julia, the Skinny Mean Twin.


According to Da'Vonne, Julia has a thinner face and different nose than The Chunky One.

Da'Vonne:  Oh...I have to stop calling her that.....I'll just say The Thicker One.

But not even 60 seconds later, Liz was "chunky" and "heavy set" again.  I don't know what you're thinking, but if Liz is "heavy set", then most of America is in big trouble.  I mean, more than we already thought we were...because as I've already mentioned, Skinny Meg has cellulite.  Sorry hon.


OK.  Here's Da'Vonne, getting ready for the PoV Ceremony.  How did Da'Vonne fuck up this week?  Well, let us count the ways.

1.  She hasn't analyzed the competition, and found her opportunities.  Day knew damn well that Meg was going on the block with her, so she should have found the people who aren't in bed with Meg (literally) and tried to work a deal with them.  People like Vanessa, Austin, Steve, John and Liz.

(Before you start yelling at me in the comments, I know she's trying to get their votes now, but she shouldn't have waited until she was halfway down the gangplank.)

2. She really messed up by not confiding in Vanessa when she had the chance.  (See here, bottom part of the post.)  Once she was nominated this week, I still think she could have gone to Vanessa and tried to mop up aisle #3, as it were. She could have eventually told Vanessa her true story and tried to earn some trust, or maybe just cut a short-term deal.  Because we all know Vanessa could talk Austin into putting a lit firecracker up his ass if she wanted to, and then The Twin would go along with the plan, too.  Vanessa wants to keep anybody who could sit next to her on the block and go home before she does, and Da'Vonne would fit into that category at this point.


3.  And on Monday afternoon, realization of the Twin Twist smacked Da'Vonne right in the face like a lightening bolt.  And what did She do?  She went into the Have Not room and woke Jason up to start furiously whispering to him about it.  With fucking James right next to Jason in his dentist chair.  James, who loves him some T. Swift and sat in the bathroom alone, near tears, after Meg was nominated during the PoV ceremoney.  Da'Vonne may like James (relative to what else is available) but he's not voting for Meg to leave this week.  And She should know that.

4.  So now James heard the scoop.  And then Da'Vonne and Jason went and sat on the backyard couches to mutter about The Twins, watching the Skinny Mean Twin rocking in the hammock, rocking a tiny brown bikini.  (In the wee hours of Tuesday morning, I heard Jason say he's never seen that Twin in anything but a "skanky bikini".)

Day has great points, about the Twins wearing hats and sunglasses all of the time.  (Have you met Vanessa, Da'Vonne?)  And then the two of them started remembering various conversational issues with A Twin that they might have written off at the time to being ditzy, or super ditzy, or just ditzy.  But now they see....The Twins been switching it up and it's tripping them up.

And I love Day, and I'm so proud of her for figuring this all out.  And it's nice that she's having the conversations about it on the live feeds where we can see it, rather than just the Diary Room.  BUT WHY IS SHE TELLING EVEYRONE ABOUT IT?  I know Jason is her Main Apple Scrapple, but he's all buddy-buddy with Meg, too.  And they've already agreed that he should vote out Da'Vonne and try to win BB on his own.  WHY DIDN'T SHE TRY TO USE THIS INFORMATION TO STAY IN THE GAME THIS WEEK?  I know everyone online is saying this now, but I said it 15 hours ago, so here I go tooting my own horn:


5.  But Da'Vonne certainly didn't consult with me yesterday. Hell no.  Instead she sat blatantly on the couch and discussed it with Jason.  Jason is one of my favorite HGs too, along with Day and Vanessa, but he is a Blabbermouth on par with Clay Honeycutt.  In fact, Meg was sitting right there on the back yard couch with them for part of the discussion.  And this morning on the live feeds, a pack of house guests were all talking about it, using the "Thick'em" slur, and indicated all of the following were also aware of it:

*  Jeff (Why, oh why would anyone tell him anything?)
*  Jackie
*  Meg
*  James
*  Steve
*  Clay
*  Shelli

Do you notice anything about that list?  Well, MOST, IF NOT ALL OF THEM ALL WANT DA'VONNE TO GET THE BOOT THIS WEEK.  And they are not the people who I think Day could have aligned with earlier this week.

6.  Day, you fucked up girl.  I think her only prayer is to try and get votes based on Meg's popularity with much of the house.  Because everyone is thinking, "Meg would never go home!", "Everybody loves Meg!", "Meg's many friends in the house would never do her dirty!".  And so on.  All of that would give the right people good reason to show Meg the door this week.

7.  Oh, and Da'Vonne did win the Last Laugh.  Apparently during a break on the feeds yesterday, a phone booth was wheeled into the house and the HG chose numbers to see which phone call they got.  And Day somehow got Lucky #7.  And the rest of them got insults, apparently, but I'd be surprised if they didn't "win" other prizes too, good or bad.

(Get this: Jeff told Clay he "forgot" his insult from Kathy.  I think that either means it was a sizzling put-down, or he won something.  But let's look on the bright side...maybe it's something bad!  And Becky's put-down was something about being a hot train wreck.  Because, train wreck.)

So, there will be 12 people voting this week, and Da'Vonne needs 7 votes to stay, since Shelli would be expected to cast a tie breaker vote to evict Da'Vonne.  Because that's her target this week...someone who has no big alliance to save her.  (I know, what the fuck.)

If Da'Vonne can correctly peg the three votes that she needs to eliminate with her Last Laugh, then she still needs 4 votes.  And I don't think she can tell anyone that she has the Last Laugh ahead of time.  So the sheep in the house won't want to vote for her to stay until there is a majority.

Once again, I think Day's only prayer would be to talk to Vanessa and hope Vanessa uses her Poker skills to read her and know Day won the Last Laugh, and hope Vanessa is willing to start playing people and swinging votes.  Because they all know what the Last Laugh is, they just don't know who has it.


Meg was cold in her shower, and let everybody know it.  By the way, it is nearly impossible to get conditioner out of your hair with cold water.  I hope Meg knows that.


Before the PoV, the HG started grabbing spots on the backyard couch that would be in the shade, so they wouldn't have to bake in the hot July sun.

Shelli:  I just realized I will be sitting out here with you guys....because this guy (John) will be the one in the house getting filmed before the ceremony.

(I wonder if Shelli also realizes that just like every HoH, her power is gone the minute she tells Meg to Take a Seat in the nomination chair.  James didn't seem to realize that last week, but maybe Clay Shelli will.)


A rare shot of Audrey with no make up.  She looks a lot older than 25, doesn't she?  I'm proud of her, though, for being filmed naturally like this.  Waking up au naturale is just part of being a girl.


Jason has vowed to stay away from slop for the rest of his Have Not sentence.  After a few days it really messes with his stomach, he says.  Instead he is enjoying protein shakes, which he said he had never tried before coming into the BB house.  He also ate a nectarine for the first time in the BB house, so his little world is just filled with wonder.


Clearly Audrey wasn't worried before the ceremony...she knew she was safe because CLAY TOLD EVERYONE.


Day had a nice moment where she noticed Steve all alone in the pool, and went over to tell him "to be careful".  She meant in the house, not the pool.  She warned him that everybody is thinking they can run all over him, but she knows he's smarter than that.  She believes in him and wants him to do well, and warns him again, because Da'Vonne is a repeater.....a repeater...

WHY IS DA'VONNE ON A FAREWELL TOUR INSTEAD OF MAKING A CASE TO GET STEVE'S VOTE?  Unlike the Survivor SuperFans, Steve can do the math, and see that Meg has way too many friends in the house.


This is the scene where Da'Vonne interrupted Jason's afternoon dental session to whisper-scream her news that there are TWO TWINS...A CHUNKY ONE AND A THIN, MEAN ONE.

Of course, James was right there, too.


And now Jason is sitting in the fabled catbird seat, isn't he?  (yet another Raising Arizona reference)

He's in no immediate danger now.  There are still so many huge targets in that house, and his own Apple Scrapple (not his Main Apple Scrapple, because I think Jason has alternates) just blew one of the Big Twists out of the water.

I'm sure he knows Alison Grodner will just come up with something else, though, but I can't imagine Production not being big Jason fans.


And here's some juicy news:

*  Jason and Da'Vonne have been talking about the people they saw during the casting process.  They use code names for protection, since they don't know the people's real names anyway.  Code names like "Slytherin" and "Sweater".

*  Jason was able to overhear "Slytherin" in one of her interviews, and heard the interviewer say this season of BB was going to be "Secrets and Lies" and prod "Slytherin" to share some dirt.  Jason said that "Slytherin" didn't really come up with anything, and now she's not on the show.

*  Da'Vonne just took this information in, making "humph" noises.  Let's not forget that Da'Vonne is lying about her job, but clearly that isn't juicy enough to qualify for a "Secrets and Lies" season, right?

*  Jason said he never mentioned that to anyone, particularly during Casting, because he didn't want to be in a position where he knew too much to appear on the show.  Da'Vonne told him to keep that under his hat this summer, to "keep it tight".  (Like the fucking Twin Twist info Da'Vonne?)

*  Apparently "Sweater" was a gay guy, too, but once Da'Vonne saw Jason, she knew "Sweater" wouldn't be the one to get cast on the show.  Also, I'm assuming "Sweater" refers to a garment the BB applicant was wearing, not any sort of perspiration issue.  But who knows, really.


***ALSO***

Some other tidbits of info I remember hearing on the live feeds:

*  Da'Vonne is absolutely disgusted with Austin's filthy shorts, that he wears "every damn day".

*  Both Da'Vonne and Jason say they were shocked to actually qualify for the show based on their backgrounds.  I think Day was saying this based on the fact that Inglewood is very tough neighborhood, but Jason has apparently been in Big Trouble before.

Day:  We all make mistakes when we're young.

James:  You know, I bet the live feeders are looking up all of the arrest info!

Jason:  Well, the State of Massachusetts is actually really good about that...

BB:  FISH.

*  Jason's dad wanted to know why he never brought girls over to the house.  Jason said he finally came out to his family when he was 18.

Jason:  But I still never bring any guys over...I don't think I've ever had sex in my own bed!

*  Jason pointed out he is the only person on the cast with no post--high school education.

Jason:  I've never even set foot on a community college!

I've also heard that Jason went to "night school", so maybe that was for high school and indicative of him having a rough ride during his school-age years.

*  Jason doesn't want Austin in the Jury House with him, saying he "doesn't want to get raped".

(I'm just presenting what the HG said here......in a previous post I mentioned that Meg and Jason discussed potential flexibility in Austin's sexual preferences, and some readers swore that was not true.  But Meg and Jason both have a lot of Gaydar experience, so I'm not surprised they are discussing it.  In fact, at one point I didn't wonder if Austin was gay....I kind of assumed it.  But I do think Austin is sort of a Renaissance Man who would not be offended by this speculation.  He's pretty open minded, so there's that.)

*  As previously mentioned, I was not excited about posting today.  I'm still mad about the wasted game opportunities, and feel overwhelmed by all of the live feeds I missed that may have been juicy overnight.  (I'm watching them now.)  But I ended up getting into it, and will drop the mic and do some real work that I get paid for now. At least for a little while.

Admission:  Sometimes I read some of my previous blog posts and make myself laugh.  And forget I even wrote them.  Like this one....I was looking for an old post about Dan Gheesling's filthy flowered shorts to tie in with the item above about Austin's filthy flowered shorts, and ended up enjoying this moment all over again.

2 comments :

  1. "The Catbird Seat" was a 1942 short story by James Thurber, so the Coens were referencing it.

    You're right, I thought Day would blackmail Liz for her vote..

    ReplyDelete
  2. Craig I am going to find that story ASAP and read it....I have at least 8 short story anthologies on the bookshelf so I'll start the search there.

    As I recall, the John Goodman character who broke out of jail is the one who used the phrase....if that is correct then I guess he was a voracious reader in the Big House.

    ReplyDelete

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