Thursday, July 26, 2012

Big Brother After Dark - The Power of Nicotine 7-26-12 #BB14

This episode of Big Brother After Dark aired on Showtime at 9:00 pm BBT on Wednesday night.  It aired in the wee hours of Thursday morning where I live.  Unfortunately I watched most of it live.  (Back problems....ouch.) I kept setting the sleep timer on my television for 30 minutes, and would then extend it by another 30 when I couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep.

Yadda yadda yadda I am watching the parts I didn't see now (basically the first and last half hours of the three hour show) and will summarize the rest.

You know, usually I will fall asleep during the commercials of network TV, but I think the Showtime commercials are so shocking with their smutiness that I watched each one, with interest.  (I usually watch BBAD on the DVR and fast forward through the commercials.)

So congratulations Showtime Promotions Department, I guess.  I'm sure you are very proud of what you do.

OK.  Let's go.

1.  Wednesday nights in the BB house are strange.  They are usually locked indoors while the backyard is prepped for the live HOH competition the next day.  Usually there is no alcohol for them, since they have to get up so early on Thursday.  It's in their best interest to mind their P's and Q's on a Wednesday night.

2.  The show opens with an HOH gathering starring Janelle, and featuring Frank, Ashley, Wil and Mike Boogie. They discuss all of the banging and pounding in the backyard and wonder what is going on out there.  Ashley and Wil think they will be locked out all night, but Janelle assures them BB is just putting the set together and it won't take all night.  She shrewdly points out that they are probably testing the lights in the backyard at the same time the show will film outdoors tomorrow night.  Janelle looks smashing with a black tank and leggings, with a black bandanna holding her hair off her face.

(Janelle is an obsessive Big Brother fan herself, so she tries to put on a good show for us.)

Janelle is telling a story about being in the bathroom with some girls who are showering and talking about how Ian always manages to be in there at the same time and it feels pervy.  Janelle knocked on the WC door and Ian was in there!

3.  Mike goes around the horn and asks everyone if they know what they are wearing for the live show. Janelle is wearing a black satin dress and pearls.  They oooh and aaah over that last part and Frank mentions that BB often has them take off neck jewelry because of the sounds it makes on their microphones.  (Something tells me Janelle will be allowed to wear her pearls, though.  It does sound like last week she had to take off her necklace.)

Frank is wearing his Julie Chen T-shirt.  Ashley says she is wearing a beachy type dress, or something like that.  Janelle adds that is perfect for playing bocce ball and winning HOH.

If Wil is "ever on the block" he plans to wear shorts, a sportcoat, no shirt, and his captain's hat.  But tomorrow night he is wearing "the shirt he wore to the POV" and a sportcoat.

Wil:  If I'm goin' out, I'm going to make a scene!

Frank thinks they might ask him not to wear that T-shirt, but Mike says probably not since they did give it to him to wear.  Janelle mentions "her sponsor" from BB7 and the cameras couldn't move away fast enough.

4.  Ian and Joe were sitting in the nomination chairs, chatting with Dan who is sprawled on the couch.

5. Now back to the HOH, where Janelle mentions the loungewear she wore in BB7--the slippers, the robes, the pajamas...Mike says it was off the hook. Mike and Frank aren't looking forward to having to sleep downstairs this week.  Mike loves to nap in his Coach's Room.  Janelle says Skid Row is super bright in the daytime, making it hard to nap.

6.  Britney is curling Danielle's hair in the bathroom, saying how sweet and likable she is.  They continue to disparage the outdoor furniture company, Patio Renaissance and their sub-standard patio goods.  Shane lays nearby and Ian has arrived and they discuss old music groups.  Like She-Daisy and some other group.  Britney sings and the cameras go back to the HOH.

7.  Mike gives a shoutout to Kara. Frank has been very generous with his HOH snacks and no one even asks anymore if they can have some...they just go over to the little table and dig in.  Wil feeds the fish and Frank mentions that the tank was making some loud noises at night and it was irritating.  They think that if the HOH comp is a crapshoot (i.e. a random skill contest) than Joe has the best chance of winning.  They think the serving of fish food is way too small and the fish may be starving.

8.  Janelle wants Ashley to win HOH so they can get a Drake CD.  Mike said he had to list 10 CDs before the show started. Ashley left a lot of lines blank on the form.  She just wants Drake.  Wil would like to get his HOH letter, as well as Pinot Grigio. Wil jokes that there are only so many paragraphs they can include on the letter and imitates his mom babbling about all of the latest news in the neighborhood.  Ashley says her mom is the same way.  Mike jokes BB will get a six page letter and have to distill it down to half a page.

9. Everyone says "Sorry BB" like Janelle always does.  They were promised a 2 hour lockdown but now it has been close to four.  Joe comes in with peanut butter ice cream (YUM) and reports that they are still drilling with a band saw outside.  He just came out of the DR and they joke about his secret power he just received.   Now Frank takes a tiny Ben & Jerry's out of his HOH fridge and it is Chocolate Fudge Brownie and there are other flavors if people want them.  It even came with a tiny spoon.  Joe added the peanut butter to his as a mix-in.

(As much as Frank eats, how can he still have HOH treats?)

10.  Wil hasn't heard Frank's CD yet and goes over to listen. Frank jokes that it will change his life and Mike almost committed suicide after listening.  Mike HATES the music.

Frank:  Would you just stop putting that on blast?  Everyone else LOVES it.

Joe says it would be good music if you could smoke a joint first and Mike agrees.  Janelle asks Mike if he smokes weed and he says no, he has, but he is "too fucking square now".

11.  Dan comes in wearing that tiresome red T-shirt AGAIN. I heard him say last week that it refers to the community he lives in, situated around a lake.  So the picture is the shape of the lake, I guess.  (Get a new shirt, Dan.)  Now they start talking about Janelle eating all of the M & Ms.  Wil liked the first song on the CD.  Frank still has Mint Chocolate Cookie and Original Vanilla ice cream.  Dan takes one and Mike wants one, but there are too many carbs.  The little spoon is concealed under the lid--Dan is eating the Mint flavor.

12.  They joke about Danielle going home (not happening) and Frank clarifies that both Dan AND Danielle will be going home.  Joe says he came upstairs after they were doing hair downstairs, and the camera switches down to the bathroom where we see Danielle's new hairstyle.  It looks really pretty and curly--pageant hair.  Now the girls are using a Chi flatiron on Ian's hair to make it stand up.  Ian is going to wear a strange costume tomorrow night, that involves a yellow cat suit from one of the competitions and cat face makeup.  Wow Danielle's hair is really pretty now, and ironically Britney's hair is dirty-looking and pulled up in a sloppy hair clip.  Ian's hair is smoking as they straighten it.  They all giggle.

13. After the commercial break we see Ian's hair and he thinks he looks like a troll doll.  (I like it better.)  Dan comes in and laughs.  Now they call him Bart Simpson.  Frank comes down and compliments both Ian and Danielle's new dos.

OK. My summary of the middle part of this show involves JoJo and her cigarettes.  Every year in the BB house there are people that are in denial about their smoking habits.  They consider themselves non-smokers and dont' bring any smokes into the house.  This year, those people are Joe and Frank, who have been pinching smokes first from Willie, and now from JoJo.  Adding to this situation is Janelle, who only brought in a few packs and only has 8 cigarettes left for the summer.

Joe made an arrangement to trade two packs of JoJo's smokes for his vote this week.  He explained to Mike that it was a "throwaway" vote since they didn't need it for the eviction.  Janelle tells him to get a carton from JoJo so it can "last them the whole summer".  Mike encourages them to just quit, that it will be good for them.  Janelle protests that she will only smoke one a day (right...) and Joe says he and Frank just get bored and need to smoke, particularly on booze nights.

Mike says that it would be hilarious if JoJo goes nuts after Julie reads the votes to evict her and runs to snatch back the cigarettes.

All night, JoJo held court in the Arcade Room, trying to win votes.  Ian and Jenn were trapped in there for some time with her, then Ashley got stuck in there as well.   It doesn't go well for her, and of course she doesn't take it well.  Everyone told her they were voting with their team, I think.  Mike and Janelle want to stir up some trouble and get JoJo to pitch an entertaining hissy fit, so Janelle decides to tell Danielle some mean things that JoJo said about her in hopes of starting a cat fight.

Janelle called Danielle up to the HOH to talk in private.  When she tells Danielle what JoJo says, she pulls her over and whispers in her ear, so we won't hear, I guess.

Janelle, leaning over in her ear:  whisper whisper whisper

Danielle:  She said I'm fat?......My legs are fat?????

Poor Danielle is devastated and it is obvious that she is holding back tears.  Janelle says she should go downstairs and confront JoJo but Dani says that is not her style--she can't be mean like that and doesn't make fun of other's physical appearances, and she will start crying.  Janelle says she will confront JoJo with Dani, but Dani doesn't want to chime in on that, but she will just stare and make it uncomfortable.

This plan is starting to backfire as Danielle is visibly hurt, so Janelle says JoJo says the same things about her, that she is fat, too.  She says that JoJo is trying to get Frank to vote Dani out but Frank won't do it.  Dani wanted to know if anybody stuck up for her and Janelle says no because Willie was HOH and everybody was scared.

Danielle said she is embarrassed and is getting upset.  Britney came in and tried to find out what they were talking about, pretending she wanted almonds.  She crunched some and offered some to Danielle.

Dani:  No.  I'm not hungry.  (awwww)

After Britney left Dani wanted to know who else thinks she's fat?  Janelle tries to say no one, that JoJo is just a hater and everyone says Janelle is fat, too.  Dani doesn't buy that, and wants to know who else heard that information.  Dani says that JoJo walked in while Britney was curling her hair and stormed out in anger because Britney was spending time with her.

Janelle:  She's such a jealous girl.

Janelle apologizes for hurting her. (She should!)  Now Frank comes in and is informed of the situation.  Frank says Danielle is a beautiful girl, with a beautiful body, and she shouldn't worry about it. Dani's voice shakes when she responds---Frank's voice is so sweet and comforting that I'm sure she is about to bawl.  He says JoJo will be gone in 24 hours, and she is picking on Dani since she won't fight back.  He also points out that Dani has great skin, and JoJo's skin sucks, and Dani seems to brighten at this info.  (JoJo's face is far from smooth, with a lot of bumps and blemishes that you can't see when she is made up.)

The backyard opened up, and everyone cheered and ran outside.  There is a large hockey rink set up in the yard, with one open end where they will use two huge hockey sticks to hit targets.  BB has left them a note to practice both straight and "bank shots".  There are large blue boxes that they can move around on the rink to use as targets.

Joe says that JoJo ran out in the backyard and grabbed her cigarettes!  So no one could smoke them!

They practiced for some time, working up a system where someone would shoot the balls ( I think there were three.) and then move behind the targets to shag the balls and send them back for the next person.

From the start, Wil was very good at the direct shots, and Ian was excellent banking the ball into the target.  JoJo didn't practice with everyone else, but continued to stew about how unfair everything is.  JoJo always says it is "obvious that she deserves to be there over Daniele".

(I think they will make the course more difficult for the live show, probably adding a slant or some other complication.  It will come down to who can handle the pressure on the live show, and put their practice knowledge to good use.)

I did not see JoJo or Shane practice with the group. (Big mistake, I think.)  Ashley's chances appear hopeless, unless she is hiding something from us.  The Coaches weren't there to Coach at first, anyway.  (I'm guessing Dan can play some hockey, but may not want to give Dani tips in front of the group.)  Frank tries to demonstrate how he would do it to his team and calls it a "saucer of milk".

Now we see JoJo and Britney in the bathroom, with Joe coming into ask for a cigarette.  JoJo siad that she would give Joe the two packs, but she doesn't want "frickin' Janelle and Frank" to smoke them.  Now she pulls him in the Have Not room and is upset that he mentioned his vote-for-cigarettes in front of other people.

Joe points out she already has two votes---his and Shane's, and she only needs one more.  She says she needs Frank's tiebreaker vote, but they shake on Joe's vote.

(Note to future HG:  Take in cartons of smokes and hoard them secretly, to use in situations like this...)

Everyone continues to practice except JoJo and Shane, who bitch and moan on the backyard couches.  Shane says their coach Britney needs to start winning to protect them, and keep them from being Have Nots.  And they bitch about Ashley being a floater who has done nothing.  They agree to come out together in the wee hours--around 3:00 am -- to practice together.

Janelle found a pack of cigarettes on the stairs and gave them to Joe--I think he left them there after his meeting with JoJo.  They think BB will add a windmill and other hazards to the course, and Britney points out that some of the targets may be negative prizes, like slop.

Alone in the storage room, Janelle told Dani that Joe sold his vote for 2 packs of cigarettes.  Dani was shocked but Janelle assures her that she has the votes to stay.  They scour the shelves for healthy snacks and Janelle finally settles on cutting up a ripe pineapple to eat with some cottage cheese.  (YUM)  Ashley told Janelle about her meeting with JoJo, who kept hounding her for a vote.  JoJo announced that his season was going to be horrible if they vote her out and also said that it was "common knowledge that BB13 was horrible".

Wil said JoJo didn't talk to him, but was a snotty bitch. Ashley said Shane was sulking and having a pity party and refused to practice with the group.  Dani says she thinks Shane plans to stay up all night to practice.  Janelle is now eating some other leftovers in the kitchen (Oh Janie!) and whispers to Wil, Dani and Ashley that they need to practice the banked shots, since there will be obstacles in their way for the live competition.

(Janelle eats most of her calories standing up in the kitchen.)

Outside JoJo tells Shane and Frank that she is good at air hockey and skee ball.  Frank is sitting there and asks for a cigarette.

JoJo:  What are you going to do when I'm not here? 

Frank laughs:  I'll fuckin' quit!  That'll be good for me!  I'll miss 'em the most when I'm drinkin'!

(Probably not the response JoJo wanted.)

She is tired of being a Have Not and eating pickles.  Joe made a great slop meal tonight with salsa.  Frank says it is really nice having Joe in there cooking for them, and that he might have maintained or lost weight without Joe there.

 ***continue reading after the jump***



Shane demonstrates the hand position on the hockey stick and shows JoJo where on the head to hit the ball.  Looks like he knows what he is doing, since he is from up north.  Frank says there may be some "fake players" on the field like an air hockey court.  JoJo asks Frank if he knows her deal with Joe for the 2 packs of smokes and Frank does know.  She needs more votes and doesn't want to push--she just wants to let him know.

Frank brings up how pushy Willie was as HOH and he doesn't want to be that way, telling people how to vote.  Dani met with Dan in the bedroom and they are putting on layers so they can practice tonight--it's cold outside.  Dani feels confident she is staying, but Dan says she needs to talk to Joe tomorrow.  She mentions what Janelle told her in the storage room about Joe trading cigarettes for votes and Dan mumbles something about it.

Ashley is making coffee and she and Ian start getting hyped up to "practice all night".

JoJo starts re-inventing history about her time in the HOH with Willie.  She mentions that Ashley slept up there, too, and that Willie often farted.  (Like Frank would care about that.....)  Frank goes inside to sleep and Britney comes out to counsel JoJo.

Britney:  I told you not to talk like this to everybody---Joe is going to give you back your cigarettes because you told everybody Janelle is running this house and bossing him around.

JoJo:  Well, that's what I thought.....

Now we see Frank and Joe, huddled in the storage room discussing the bartered cigarettes.  Joe may walk out there and give the smokes back to JoJo, and wants Frank's advice on that.  Frank says to wait until tomorrow, but Joe says it may not be good to make Danielle mad at him.

Frank, smiling:  It's kind of tough...I know those cigarettes would be nice to have out there, while we're chill.....

Joe knows that after JoJo leaves, that is it for the cigarettes.  He is going to approach JoJo tomorrow and tell her she can give him the cigarettes, but he can't do anything for her.  He might give her some of his BB collectibles to sell online, but will say he can't do anything about the vote.

(Is no one thinking about a former player re-entering the game?)

Joe says the cigarettes feel dirty to him now, and they're not worth all that.

(ha ha ha)

Ashley is telling Janelle that Ian tells Mike Boogie everything and Janelle groans.  (Don't know what they are referring to.)  Now Frank comes in to say good night and Janelle tells him that JoJo is running around the house telling everybody they will smoke all of her cigarettes.

Frank stirs up trouble by saying that JoJo said that Britney told her that Janelle told Frank to nominate her.  (Got that?)  Janelle gets all fired up and wants to go outside to confront JoJo.

Janelle:  That is so FUCKED up!

She storms outside to confront JoJo, and some of the schrapnel hits Britney, who is sitting outside with JoJo.  JoJo wants to go to the Arcade to talk and the three of them walk slowly back there to talk it out.

JoJo starts babbling.  Janelle listens but objects when necessary.  Britney says and does nothing.

And on that note, the Showtime presentation ended.

(Why can't Britney control her team?)

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